As Axel Rose once scream so appropriately....
You know where you are
You're in the jungle baby
You're gonna die
And the Lion of this Jungle is named...the Washinator!
Once again my flare for the dramatic even impresses me...nough said
Today was the first day that the G-Star was going to be introduced to the 'joy's of the Washinator's Jungle and she and I were going to have to fight for our lives!
On with the gloves, the headgear and the mouthguard...let's do battle...its cardio box!
Now I realise the term Cardio Box sounds somewhat...well...girly but when faced with a trainer who for all intents and purposes is a cross between the Predator and Alien girly, I can assure you if the last thing it is.
What was interesting was that in between my final gasps for breath in order to well...LIVE...the G-Star and Washinator squared off about of all things core strength. Now I don't know if I have previously mentioned but the G-Star is well a bit of a Yogi (that is a Yoga practitioner/fan). What this translates to is freakish upper body strength and a core that can out plank the best of them...apparently NOT the Washinator...oh no...no way...no how!
The Washinator has set a little bit of a challenge, thrown down the gauntlet so to speak and it goes a little something like this...
I may not have previously informed you all but in order to focus on the star of this show i.e. ME...the G-Star and I determined that from this point forward (or at least for the remainder of the in-house competition) that I would undertake the excruciating pain that is Wash'time by myself...that is alone...that is just me...that is (breaking into show tunes once again):
On my own
Pretending he's beside me
All alone
I walk with him 'til morning
Without him, I feel his arms around me
And when I lose my way, I close my eyes and he has found me
In the rain
The pavement shines like silver
All the lights are misty in the river
In the darkness, the trees are full of starlight
And all I see is him and me forever and forever
And I know it's only in my mind
That I'm talking to myself and not to him
And although I know that he is blind
Still I say there's a way for us
I love him
But when the night is over
He is gone
The river's just a river
Without him, the world around me changes
The trees are bare and everywhere the streets are full of strangers
I love him
But every day I'm lonely
All my life I've only been pretending
Without me, his world will go on turning
The world is full of happiness that I have never known
I love him
I love him
I love him...
But only on my own...
I digress...but you get the picture.
Anyhoo, desperately wanting to share my love and show in a powerful display of commitment and caring I purchased my G-Star a present (so to speak)...lovingly, with kisses and a cherry on top I have bought the G-Star...
Twice weekly Personal Training sessions with the Washinator (applause please people...I'm showing the love)...and this is where we return to the Mexican standoff (akin to the Predator and the Alien)...
The G-Star was somewhat offended at the inference (made by the Washinator) that her core strength, well, needed some work....'I could out plank YOU!' she asserted with a somewhat temper tantrumesq air...'You think so Princess' (or some words akin to these from the Washinator) 'Well then within four weeks we will be having a Swiss ball squat stand-off!'...'You're on'...now it may not have gone down exactly like that but you get the idea...fortunately for fat little me, the Mexican standoff provided me with ample time to waddle behind a very large piece of equipment and well, hide!
So, it's on people...not only is he determined to kill me..he has now thrown down the challenge to break the G-Star....stay tuned.
That said the morning came and went as did the afternoon with no additional efforts on my part and in reality a somewhat poor dietary effort (considering my recently obtained expert advice and direction). All in all another lack lustre Saturday (as they all have been) and the dreaded veil of fatness descending with a very likely poor performance tomorrow on the death dealers...
Yours in trepidation and fatness
LBL
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