Now if we look back over the past 7 weeks we will notice a pattern...traditionally a 'good' day in the world of a fatty such as myself is, historically speaking always followed by...well...a crap day! Not this week my little fat uber exerciser! There was absolutely no way in Satan's Lair I was going to let my pitiful fat history (even if it is a short history) repeat itself!!!!
So a crappy early morning session with the Bastardo (really getting OVER this cold friggin weather!) and having bribed the ever committed G-Star (aka G-Enabler) with her standard cold morning breakfast in bed with a heated bedroom and a cup of tea...we trudged off to Satan's Lair...oooh the Lair our second home...
Training Time:7.01am
Length of Training Time: 30min 34sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 229
Cal Fat: 30%
Not bad...could be better...so let us introduce.....
TREVIVE......
What madness is this, you may well ask??? Well...the fat little me is finally (after 7 whole weeks) joining group training....What...crazy woman alert...group training...what is this insanity...fat goes one way...arms and legs go another...it's U...G....L.....Y you ain't got no alibi...IT'S UGLY!!
Now, I know we introduced the concept of group training this time last week and can I tell you...it hasn't gotten any prettier...Trevive is ma bitch Treva's adaptation of the supposedly low impact group training torture Body Vive...Trevive consists of lots of Britny Bitch (for the music) cardio, weights, balance and stretches for a lovely 60mins...to add insult to injury I dragged the ever flexible Madster along for the torture...the result (other than yet another deeply humiliating and dignity stripping episode for the Fatster):
Training Time:9.34am
Length of Training Time: 52min 09sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 277
Cal Fat: 39%
Home for a wardrobe change (and a quick Nana Nap) and off to pick up the G-Star, my car and back to Satan's Lair for the day's wrap up...a run with the Bastardo:
Training Time:3.55pm
Length of Training Time: 30min 05sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 267
Cal Fat: 24%
Although the G-Star wanted to back up for another session in the evening my fat little legs, particularly my right shin is completely up to shit...I look like a fat, dottering, old lady waddling with my invisible zimmer frame and a blue rinse through my permed and set hair...it's a sad, sad, sad sight...so another run was completely out of the question...a hot shower...my at home fat tracky dackies and a beautiful low cal, low fat dinner (and dessert) cooked by my beautiful Madster and the day is done...
According to my Biggest Loser oracle my caloric deficit for the day was a solid 1815 calories... it's coming together people...under 100kg or bust!!!
Yours in fatness
LBL
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Week 8 - Tuesday 29 June
It's under 100kg or bust this week people! Having re-grouped from my 5day funk of last week, I have harnessed a new determination (unfortunately still working with the same sub-standard product - me) and finally taken the Donna Summers song into my heart and found a new attitude! (At least I think it's Donna Summers - correct please if I am wrong!)
BIG FOCUS for the remainder of week 8 - food...being absolutely, 100% NO 200% spot on with my food - Yes Molly that means no more Vita Wheats with butter and Vegemite - I digress...Molly, Kylie and the Grasshopper are our (the G-Star and my) Bella Bitches...to be precise their our suppliers...our drug of choice Barons so to speak...THEY MAKE THE BEST COFFEE IN THE WORLD!!!! and they are also reading my blog...if only to be able to take the piss out of me! When I dared to question the Barista integrity of my Bella Bitches the other day by seeking assurance that my half strength,skinny jumbo latte was being made on skim milk the lovely, and obviously very quick witted Molly highlighted that perhaps my downfall has not been the coffee but rather the Vita Wheat with butter and veg! Good point Sensai, good point...
So with a wake up call from one of my not so avid followers and considering the completely pathetic funk I had gotten myself in to last week...I am determined that this week will see me below 100kg or I will die trying!!!
So today dawned with a new fat verve, so to speak, a not so sprightly spring in my step and off to Satan's Lair to start the day's torture...
Training Time:7.43am
Length of Training Time: 55min 00sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 476
Cal Fat: 25%
We are officially off and running - literally... so let's talk about running for a second. Have you ever had the misfortune of witnessing a 102.3kg fatty attempting to run on a treadmill...I don't mean on the television, I mean in REAL LIFE??? It ain't pretty but unfortunately it's necessary. I have learnt over the past 7 weeks that the key to solid fat loss is cardiovascular exercise and the pinnacle of cardio is...the interval train!!! Interval training is...A BITCH...it hurts, you sweat like all get out and breathing is an optional extra that you valiantly attempt to achieve before everything turns black and you concuss yourself as you are falling flat on your face on the dreadmill! So, that's what I mean by running...
And more running I did...back to Satan's Lair for my afternoon beat up with the Bastardo and the G-Enabler...yes that's right her name has officially changed from the G-Star to the G-Enabler...why..work with me here people we're in for another ride...
So after the morning session...the G-Star had a meeting in the city...so, given that we are still down to one car...her little fat Chauffeur delivered her to her meeting with the promise of a collection and coffee at the brilliant new 'celebrity' hang out - obviously it's celebrity - I'm going there! (owned and operated by the lovely Ben and luscious Ryan) - Symposium at Teneriffe/Fortitude Valley. Having ensured I had consumed my morning Fruit Shake so as not to be hungry and tempted by the luscious and lovely Symposium menu, collected the G-Star with the Madster and headed to coffee. This is where the G-Star morphed into the evil G-Enabler. As previously mentioned this week's word dojour is 'food'! and come fat or high water my caloric intake and menu for the week is going to be SPOT ON! So, a coffee was what I was scheduled to have and THAT's what I was going to have...the G-Star however is not required to be sooo diligent about her caloric intake and nor do I require her to...the G-Star does not have a weight problem and her support and never ending dedication on most days is the only thing that really gets me through, so I have absolutely no expectation that she or the perfectly proportioned Madster abstain from enjoying the lovely treats on offer at Symposium. Where we run in to problems is that because the G-Star loves me unconditionally she has loved me through fat, more fat and most fat...she sometimes becomes a little bit blind to my caloric shortcomings...hence her evil alter ego comes out to play and we are introduced to G-Enabler... (keep watching this spot there will be a product line produced for the G-Enabler...T-Shirts, Caps etc) The G-Enabler loves to say to little fat me, here honey try a bit of this Belgium Waffle with full fat extra dollop cream, strawberries and honey....IT'S DELICIOUS!!! Now I realise the G-Enabler believes that a 'little' taste wont hurt and hell she loves me anyway but NO...NO...NO evil G-Enabler away with you, curse your evil calories wrapped in a whipped layer of cream with strawberries...away with you. The fat little chunker returned home victorious...nary a waffle or drop of cream passed these fat little lips!!
So, back to Satan's Lair and that's right, more running:
Training Time:4.00pm
Length of Training Time: 37min 44sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 359
Cal Fat: 22%
Fortunately for me, the evil G-Enabler went back to her caloric laden lair and the G-Star reappeared for the afternoon and evening's festivities. Not content with ending the day on that piddly amount of training, we backed up for another run:
Training Time:6.50pm
Length of Training Time: 23min 06sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 224
Cal Fat: 21%
A quick sauna and the day was done...according to my Biggest Loser Calorie monitoring chart my day's caloric deficit came in at a decent 2389 calories...not too shabby even if I do say so myself.
Although the shins are suffering a bit and yes the bedroom smells like a football locker room thanks to the Denko rub...I am pretty pleased with my efforts for the day...we're off an running people...under 100kg or bust!!!
Yours in fatness
LBL
BIG FOCUS for the remainder of week 8 - food...being absolutely, 100% NO 200% spot on with my food - Yes Molly that means no more Vita Wheats with butter and Vegemite - I digress...Molly, Kylie and the Grasshopper are our (the G-Star and my) Bella Bitches...to be precise their our suppliers...our drug of choice Barons so to speak...THEY MAKE THE BEST COFFEE IN THE WORLD!!!! and they are also reading my blog...if only to be able to take the piss out of me! When I dared to question the Barista integrity of my Bella Bitches the other day by seeking assurance that my half strength,skinny jumbo latte was being made on skim milk the lovely, and obviously very quick witted Molly highlighted that perhaps my downfall has not been the coffee but rather the Vita Wheat with butter and veg! Good point Sensai, good point...
So with a wake up call from one of my not so avid followers and considering the completely pathetic funk I had gotten myself in to last week...I am determined that this week will see me below 100kg or I will die trying!!!
So today dawned with a new fat verve, so to speak, a not so sprightly spring in my step and off to Satan's Lair to start the day's torture...
Training Time:7.43am
Length of Training Time: 55min 00sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 476
Cal Fat: 25%
We are officially off and running - literally... so let's talk about running for a second. Have you ever had the misfortune of witnessing a 102.3kg fatty attempting to run on a treadmill...I don't mean on the television, I mean in REAL LIFE??? It ain't pretty but unfortunately it's necessary. I have learnt over the past 7 weeks that the key to solid fat loss is cardiovascular exercise and the pinnacle of cardio is...the interval train!!! Interval training is...A BITCH...it hurts, you sweat like all get out and breathing is an optional extra that you valiantly attempt to achieve before everything turns black and you concuss yourself as you are falling flat on your face on the dreadmill! So, that's what I mean by running...
And more running I did...back to Satan's Lair for my afternoon beat up with the Bastardo and the G-Enabler...yes that's right her name has officially changed from the G-Star to the G-Enabler...why..work with me here people we're in for another ride...
So after the morning session...the G-Star had a meeting in the city...so, given that we are still down to one car...her little fat Chauffeur delivered her to her meeting with the promise of a collection and coffee at the brilliant new 'celebrity' hang out - obviously it's celebrity - I'm going there! (owned and operated by the lovely Ben and luscious Ryan) - Symposium at Teneriffe/Fortitude Valley. Having ensured I had consumed my morning Fruit Shake so as not to be hungry and tempted by the luscious and lovely Symposium menu, collected the G-Star with the Madster and headed to coffee. This is where the G-Star morphed into the evil G-Enabler. As previously mentioned this week's word dojour is 'food'! and come fat or high water my caloric intake and menu for the week is going to be SPOT ON! So, a coffee was what I was scheduled to have and THAT's what I was going to have...the G-Star however is not required to be sooo diligent about her caloric intake and nor do I require her to...the G-Star does not have a weight problem and her support and never ending dedication on most days is the only thing that really gets me through, so I have absolutely no expectation that she or the perfectly proportioned Madster abstain from enjoying the lovely treats on offer at Symposium. Where we run in to problems is that because the G-Star loves me unconditionally she has loved me through fat, more fat and most fat...she sometimes becomes a little bit blind to my caloric shortcomings...hence her evil alter ego comes out to play and we are introduced to G-Enabler... (keep watching this spot there will be a product line produced for the G-Enabler...T-Shirts, Caps etc) The G-Enabler loves to say to little fat me, here honey try a bit of this Belgium Waffle with full fat extra dollop cream, strawberries and honey....IT'S DELICIOUS!!! Now I realise the G-Enabler believes that a 'little' taste wont hurt and hell she loves me anyway but NO...NO...NO evil G-Enabler away with you, curse your evil calories wrapped in a whipped layer of cream with strawberries...away with you. The fat little chunker returned home victorious...nary a waffle or drop of cream passed these fat little lips!!
So, back to Satan's Lair and that's right, more running:
Training Time:4.00pm
Length of Training Time: 37min 44sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 359
Cal Fat: 22%
Fortunately for me, the evil G-Enabler went back to her caloric laden lair and the G-Star reappeared for the afternoon and evening's festivities. Not content with ending the day on that piddly amount of training, we backed up for another run:
Training Time:6.50pm
Length of Training Time: 23min 06sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 224
Cal Fat: 21%
A quick sauna and the day was done...according to my Biggest Loser Calorie monitoring chart my day's caloric deficit came in at a decent 2389 calories...not too shabby even if I do say so myself.
Although the shins are suffering a bit and yes the bedroom smells like a football locker room thanks to the Denko rub...I am pretty pleased with my efforts for the day...we're off an running people...under 100kg or bust!!!
Yours in fatness
LBL
Monday, June 28, 2010
Week 7 - Friday 25 - Monday 28 June with Weigh In
As you can see, I haven't been blogging for the last few days...why you may ask...because I have been spending my time more productively engaged staring at my fat navel and wallowing in my own fat self pity! I've said it before and I am sure before the end of this nightmare I will say it again...Weight Loss SUCKS and it sucks on sooooo many levels.
I recognise that I may be coming across as well, somewhat selfish, self centered, self absorbed, pathetic, a cry baby and I readily admit at this point in time all of these descriptors sum me up in toto...What is it that I have to be pissed off about...is it that in the back of my head I had actually led myself to believe that I could replicate the Biggest Loser Weight Loss Phenomenon (as they market it on the television) and lose masses amounts of weight in seemingly micro seconds?? I think one part of me wanted to believe that...the other part of me (one might say the cynical part of me) knew that it was really a crock of shit...but let's take the ride of the last few days to see how I got to this miserable point...
The Bastardo has abandoned me (albeit for a limited time) but none the less a highly strung, highly needy fat person like myself cannot afford to be abandoned especially not by the Bastardo...no doubt some further explanation is required...It was the Bastardo's Birthday on Sunday (27 June...Happy F**king Birthday) and given he has biological family down south who are apparently MORE important than ME he departed for colder climes on Thursday following our afternoon run...Now a proper Biggest Loser Contestant (unlike the try hard that I am) would have had a plan for the days that the Bastardo was AWOL and to a certain extent I did....I wasn't going to do ANYTHING!!! Now that's a plan!!! Not completely accurate but it did make me sound like a REAL FAT REBEL!!!
Friday was to introduce training with my Biggest Loser Guru Sharif who now runs his own PT business called Sharifit. Sharif is a follower of Commando Steve's training style called Cross Fit which involves high intensity over a defined period of time... of course I dragged the ever faithfully G-Star along to share the pain. What I found really good about the hour session was the real focus on making sure our technique was good particularly with Sit Ups, Step Ups and Push Ups...One mild stone I did achieve throughout the training was I actually completed 5 x 12inch box jumps all by myself (given that Sharif refused to provide me with arm stabilising support...Bastard!) The session was hard and resulted in a bit of soreness over the following few days in the legs and stomach but all in all a not so fun time was had by all:
Training Time:8.00am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 07min 08sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 347
Cal Fat: 37%
The rest of the day was spent, well really in pampering...being completely unable (and to be honest unwilling) to allow my Syndrome (check out the Incredibles if you don't understand the character reference) hair any longer I headed off to the gorgeous Anthony (my Master Stylist) to get a new, funky and far more controllable do! After that it was time for my weekly massage with Mo (who as we have previously mentioned has the hands of a Goddess!) - an hour and a half of lovely, oily pleasure (which did not involve any effort on my part) and I was really ready for a nice nana nap...however this was not to be...because it was GIRLS NIGHT OUT!!! And fat girl...given my state of mind..it was going to be a BIG NIGHT!! and it was...dinner at Mecca Bah - Turkish Pizza and then off the Freestyle Dessert Bar to completely gormandise on a warm Sticky Date Pudding!!!! Biggest Loser be damned this Fatty was going for broke!!!
Not content with completely bastardising my caloric intake for the day I decided to torpedo the entire week with Saturday and Sunday consisting of Buttermilk Pancakes, Pizza and Grilled Burgers (obviously not in one sitting but hey you get the picture) and to round out (literally) a completely shit week...Saturday, Sunday and Monday - NO EXERCISE!
So what does this mean exactly...that I have lost the plot...YES...that I want to binge on every piece of crap food in site...YES...that I never want to see the inside of Satan's Lair or the Bastardo again in my entire life....YES, well Maybe well OK NO but these flashes of bliss have crossed my mind over the past few days.
By the end of week 7 my scheduled weight loss chart (based on the historic reference of loss from the illustrious Biggest Loser - The Show) indicated I should and WOULD be 89.3kg INSTEAD I remain stuck in the burdensome 3 digit vortex of fat at 102.3kg (a weekly loss of 0.7kg or put another way 700g). In terms of the 'competition':
Australian Series:
Alas a dismal last AGAIN!!! I recognise my vibrant personality and witticisms are all that is saving me in this competition but for F**K sake can I cut a break...obviously this week I don't really deserve to have cut a break but come ON...I have been trying!!!
OK over to the US:
So with Week 7 drawn to a close and Week 8 off to a non-existent exercise start there is a real need to re-group and figure out why this experiment isn't working like it does on the TV or 'in the house' and what a fat person like myself needs to remain committed and focussed on masses of weight loss in a short period of time...I have been waxing lyrical on this for what seems like weeks and as yet have not been able to hit on the IT that seems to come with being 'on/in' the Biggest Loser Competition.
Alas, as another entry ends...yours in continued fatness
LBL
I recognise that I may be coming across as well, somewhat selfish, self centered, self absorbed, pathetic, a cry baby and I readily admit at this point in time all of these descriptors sum me up in toto...What is it that I have to be pissed off about...is it that in the back of my head I had actually led myself to believe that I could replicate the Biggest Loser Weight Loss Phenomenon (as they market it on the television) and lose masses amounts of weight in seemingly micro seconds?? I think one part of me wanted to believe that...the other part of me (one might say the cynical part of me) knew that it was really a crock of shit...but let's take the ride of the last few days to see how I got to this miserable point...
The Bastardo has abandoned me (albeit for a limited time) but none the less a highly strung, highly needy fat person like myself cannot afford to be abandoned especially not by the Bastardo...no doubt some further explanation is required...It was the Bastardo's Birthday on Sunday (27 June...Happy F**king Birthday) and given he has biological family down south who are apparently MORE important than ME he departed for colder climes on Thursday following our afternoon run...Now a proper Biggest Loser Contestant (unlike the try hard that I am) would have had a plan for the days that the Bastardo was AWOL and to a certain extent I did....I wasn't going to do ANYTHING!!! Now that's a plan!!! Not completely accurate but it did make me sound like a REAL FAT REBEL!!!
Friday was to introduce training with my Biggest Loser Guru Sharif who now runs his own PT business called Sharifit. Sharif is a follower of Commando Steve's training style called Cross Fit which involves high intensity over a defined period of time... of course I dragged the ever faithfully G-Star along to share the pain. What I found really good about the hour session was the real focus on making sure our technique was good particularly with Sit Ups, Step Ups and Push Ups...One mild stone I did achieve throughout the training was I actually completed 5 x 12inch box jumps all by myself (given that Sharif refused to provide me with arm stabilising support...Bastard!) The session was hard and resulted in a bit of soreness over the following few days in the legs and stomach but all in all a not so fun time was had by all:
Training Time:8.00am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 07min 08sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 347
Cal Fat: 37%
The rest of the day was spent, well really in pampering...being completely unable (and to be honest unwilling) to allow my Syndrome (check out the Incredibles if you don't understand the character reference) hair any longer I headed off to the gorgeous Anthony (my Master Stylist) to get a new, funky and far more controllable do! After that it was time for my weekly massage with Mo (who as we have previously mentioned has the hands of a Goddess!) - an hour and a half of lovely, oily pleasure (which did not involve any effort on my part) and I was really ready for a nice nana nap...however this was not to be...because it was GIRLS NIGHT OUT!!! And fat girl...given my state of mind..it was going to be a BIG NIGHT!! and it was...dinner at Mecca Bah - Turkish Pizza and then off the Freestyle Dessert Bar to completely gormandise on a warm Sticky Date Pudding!!!! Biggest Loser be damned this Fatty was going for broke!!!
Not content with completely bastardising my caloric intake for the day I decided to torpedo the entire week with Saturday and Sunday consisting of Buttermilk Pancakes, Pizza and Grilled Burgers (obviously not in one sitting but hey you get the picture) and to round out (literally) a completely shit week...Saturday, Sunday and Monday - NO EXERCISE!
So what does this mean exactly...that I have lost the plot...YES...that I want to binge on every piece of crap food in site...YES...that I never want to see the inside of Satan's Lair or the Bastardo again in my entire life....YES, well Maybe well OK NO but these flashes of bliss have crossed my mind over the past few days.
By the end of week 7 my scheduled weight loss chart (based on the historic reference of loss from the illustrious Biggest Loser - The Show) indicated I should and WOULD be 89.3kg INSTEAD I remain stuck in the burdensome 3 digit vortex of fat at 102.3kg (a weekly loss of 0.7kg or put another way 700g). In terms of the 'competition':
Australian Series:
| Contestant | Starting Weight | Week 7 | Loss | % |
| Lisa | 121.9 | 84.7 | 5.1 | 6.0% |
| Rick | 172.6 | 116.6 | 5.7 | 4.9% |
| Joe | 179.9 | 126.5 | 6.1 | 4.8% |
| Shannon | 214.3 | 157.9 | 7.1 | 4.5% |
| Phil | 146.9 | 94.1 | 3.9 | 4.1% |
| Caitlan | 179.0 | 131.5 | 5.4 | 4.1% |
| Phoebe | 116 | 85 | 2.8 | 3.3% |
| David | 165.6 | 113.3 | 2.5 | 2.2% |
| LBL | 112 | 102.3 | 0.7 | 0.68% |
| Daina | 105.2 |
|
|
|
| Chris | 129.9 |
|
|
|
| Wayne | 161.5 |
|
|
|
| Jarna | 118.8 |
|
|
|
| Teneal | 97.4 |
|
|
|
| Elise | 104.6 |
|
|
|
| Jenni | 130.6 |
|
|
|
| Geoff | 161.6 |
|
|
|
| Romi | 99.3 |
|
|
|
| Allan | 151.8 |
|
|
|
Alas a dismal last AGAIN!!! I recognise my vibrant personality and witticisms are all that is saving me in this competition but for F**K sake can I cut a break...obviously this week I don't really deserve to have cut a break but come ON...I have been trying!!!
OK over to the US:
| Contestant | Starting Weight | Week 7 | Loss | % |
| Stephanie | 120 | 96.83 | 3.63 | 3.7% |
| Michael | 239.09 | 189.58 | 6.8 | 3.6% |
| Sherry | 99.09 | 77.74 | 2.72 | 3.5% |
| Ashley | 170.0 | 136.44 | 4.54 | 3.3% |
| Koli | 183.18 | 143.66 | 4.54 | 3.2% |
| Sunshine | 125 | 105.47 | 3.18 | 3.0% |
| O'Neal | 176.82 | 143.66 | 4.08 | 2.8% |
| Sam | 169.09 | 131.85 | 3.63 | 2.8% |
| Darris | 157.27 | 121.38 | 3.18 | 2.6% |
| Cheryl | 103.18 | 85.03 | 1.8 | 2.1% |
| Andrea | 135.45 | 113.65 | 2.27 | 2.0% |
| Miggy | 109.09 | 91.85 | 1.8 | 2.0% |
| Lance | 165.91 | 136.37 | 2.28 | 1.7% |
| LBL | 112 | 103 | 0.7 | 0.68% |
| Victoria | 162.73 | 145 | 0 | 0.0% |
| Melissa | 105.91 | 99.09 | 0 | 0.0% |
| Darryl | 190.91 |
|
|
|
| John | 220 |
|
|
|
| Cherita | 125.91 |
|
|
|
| Migdalia | 120.45 |
|
|
|
| Maria | 127.73 |
|
|
|
| James | 220.45 |
|
|
|
| Patti | 110.45 |
|
|
|
So with Week 7 drawn to a close and Week 8 off to a non-existent exercise start there is a real need to re-group and figure out why this experiment isn't working like it does on the TV or 'in the house' and what a fat person like myself needs to remain committed and focussed on masses of weight loss in a short period of time...I have been waxing lyrical on this for what seems like weeks and as yet have not been able to hit on the IT that seems to come with being 'on/in' the Biggest Loser Competition.
Alas, as another entry ends...yours in continued fatness
LBL
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Week 7 - Thursday 24 June
This is crap! This week has been an even bigger unmitigated disaster than any of the weeks before and to be perfectly honest...I'm over it, I want to wake up tomorrow and be 60kg, have the body of a goddess and never have to think about calories again...obviously I am currently delusional but work with me here people!
Weight loss sucks...and on some days it sucks more than others...my food has been shot to hell, for three days this week I have been over my 1200 calorie quota....I haven't been eating crap per say, just eating too much of things like wholemeal Vita Wheats with butter (mmmm butter) and well I still haven't gotten over the frittata debacle of 2010...I am still diabolically unable to reach more than 2hours training a day...I promise myself, I threaten myself, I cajole myself...I fail myself...
This brings me to the idea of COMMITMENT...an interesting concept and one that is all too rarely found in today's society...yes, yes I am about to wax lyrical again but come along for the ride...you know you want to...
Once again, I had attempted to structure my day in such a way as to achieve at least a 3 hour exercise day...PT...Cardio....Yoga....Run
Did the PT....
Training Time:6.48am
Length of Training Time: 37min 11sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 284
Cal Fat: 30%
Did the Cardio
Training Time:10.24am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 02min 06sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 529
Cal Fat: 30%
So it was off to Yoga...now Yoga may not sound like a Biggest Loser workout but in terms of conditioning a fat person's body it is great for flexibility and strength...it also has a meditative value that cannot be underestimated when you are torturing your body on a daily basis (or at least torturing it in principle).
The G-Star, who is currently working full time for a client of ours, had actively attempted to promote health and wellness in terms of a work environment...to this end she had arranged for the staff to be offered a 6 week Yoga for Beginners (1hour per week) for an amazing price of $90...in addition to this, the Star had been able to convince the CEO to allow any staff who wanted to do the Yoga an hour off (not docked out of their time or pay) to actively work on their health and well being... Well several weeks ago when the G-Star started to organise this there was a resounding 'Hell YES!' from the staff...there were 10 committed and the Madster and I were going to round (literally on my part) out the numbers for the class. So a little excited at the prospect of undertaking a Yoga lesson that wouldn't see me huddled in the corner in a foetal position sucking my fat thumb...the Madster and I headed off to Yoga.
This is where we get to the Fat Guru's little lecture about commitment and consideration for other people's time and efforts...About 20mins before Yoga was due to start and the instructor had just arrived, the G-Star went to get changed and ran in to two of the supposed 'starters' for the class...the G-Star with her keen sense of observation noted that these individuals had not bothered to move from their sedentary positions at their desks and casually reminded them that Yoga was about to kick off...to which, one of the ignorant individuals informed the G-Star that 'the bunch of them had decided that the Yoga was too expensive, they couldn't afford it so they decided they were just not gunna turn up...'
As you can imagine the G-Star was, well to put it as mildly as possible, ENRAGED...not only had these ignorant and manner less individuals f**ked around with her time and energies but they had not given one shit about the Yoga Instructor's time, travel etc...the fact that these people had made 'a commitment' to attend obviously meant absolutely nothing and to add insult to injury they don't even possess the common manners or courtesy to actually have the guts to come and tell the G-Star of their lack of character...So what does this actually mean for fat little me...NO YOGA...A LIVID G-STAR and no calories burnt...thank you to all those really COMMITTED people who don't give a shit about anyone else except themselves!
So how does this have relevance to fat ol' me and what I am trying to achieve...I have attempted to deconstruct this in the best way I possibly can and what it comes down to is that I feel really disappointed in myself and this experiment...my COMMITMENT...at least to my way of thinking has been limited and I haven't been giving due consideration to the fact that there are a lot (and I mean A LOT) of people who have invested in me and this idea...My sense of failure stems from the fact we are nearing the end of week 7 and to date I have lost a measly 9kg...this compared to the actual Biggest Loser contestants who have lost upwards of 20,30,40kg leaves me feeling...well...
I'm sure you are all bored to death of my waxing lyrical about my failure, my lack of success, my...well...fatness...so I will wallow in my own self pity on my own time...need to round out the day...
Following the Yoga fiasco (except for the WONDERFUL Sue who was ready and raring to go and was let down and disappointed like the G-Star and myself) I made it back to Satan's Lair for an afternoon run with Bastardo:
Training Time:3.06pm
Length of Training Time: 30min 13sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 289
Cal Fat: 23%
Once again I am not hopeful of cracking it (the 100kg mark) this week...quite the contrary...I'm feeling excessively bloated and very underdone...the only hope is that I haven't put on any weight for this week...
Yours in miserable fatness
LBL
Weight loss sucks...and on some days it sucks more than others...my food has been shot to hell, for three days this week I have been over my 1200 calorie quota....I haven't been eating crap per say, just eating too much of things like wholemeal Vita Wheats with butter (mmmm butter) and well I still haven't gotten over the frittata debacle of 2010...I am still diabolically unable to reach more than 2hours training a day...I promise myself, I threaten myself, I cajole myself...I fail myself...
This brings me to the idea of COMMITMENT...an interesting concept and one that is all too rarely found in today's society...yes, yes I am about to wax lyrical again but come along for the ride...you know you want to...
Once again, I had attempted to structure my day in such a way as to achieve at least a 3 hour exercise day...PT...Cardio....Yoga....Run
Did the PT....
Training Time:6.48am
Length of Training Time: 37min 11sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 284
Cal Fat: 30%
Did the Cardio
Training Time:10.24am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 02min 06sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 529
Cal Fat: 30%
So it was off to Yoga...now Yoga may not sound like a Biggest Loser workout but in terms of conditioning a fat person's body it is great for flexibility and strength...it also has a meditative value that cannot be underestimated when you are torturing your body on a daily basis (or at least torturing it in principle).
The G-Star, who is currently working full time for a client of ours, had actively attempted to promote health and wellness in terms of a work environment...to this end she had arranged for the staff to be offered a 6 week Yoga for Beginners (1hour per week) for an amazing price of $90...in addition to this, the Star had been able to convince the CEO to allow any staff who wanted to do the Yoga an hour off (not docked out of their time or pay) to actively work on their health and well being... Well several weeks ago when the G-Star started to organise this there was a resounding 'Hell YES!' from the staff...there were 10 committed and the Madster and I were going to round (literally on my part) out the numbers for the class. So a little excited at the prospect of undertaking a Yoga lesson that wouldn't see me huddled in the corner in a foetal position sucking my fat thumb...the Madster and I headed off to Yoga.
This is where we get to the Fat Guru's little lecture about commitment and consideration for other people's time and efforts...About 20mins before Yoga was due to start and the instructor had just arrived, the G-Star went to get changed and ran in to two of the supposed 'starters' for the class...the G-Star with her keen sense of observation noted that these individuals had not bothered to move from their sedentary positions at their desks and casually reminded them that Yoga was about to kick off...to which, one of the ignorant individuals informed the G-Star that 'the bunch of them had decided that the Yoga was too expensive, they couldn't afford it so they decided they were just not gunna turn up...'
As you can imagine the G-Star was, well to put it as mildly as possible, ENRAGED...not only had these ignorant and manner less individuals f**ked around with her time and energies but they had not given one shit about the Yoga Instructor's time, travel etc...the fact that these people had made 'a commitment' to attend obviously meant absolutely nothing and to add insult to injury they don't even possess the common manners or courtesy to actually have the guts to come and tell the G-Star of their lack of character...So what does this actually mean for fat little me...NO YOGA...A LIVID G-STAR and no calories burnt...thank you to all those really COMMITTED people who don't give a shit about anyone else except themselves!
So how does this have relevance to fat ol' me and what I am trying to achieve...I have attempted to deconstruct this in the best way I possibly can and what it comes down to is that I feel really disappointed in myself and this experiment...my COMMITMENT...at least to my way of thinking has been limited and I haven't been giving due consideration to the fact that there are a lot (and I mean A LOT) of people who have invested in me and this idea...My sense of failure stems from the fact we are nearing the end of week 7 and to date I have lost a measly 9kg...this compared to the actual Biggest Loser contestants who have lost upwards of 20,30,40kg leaves me feeling...well...
I'm sure you are all bored to death of my waxing lyrical about my failure, my lack of success, my...well...fatness...so I will wallow in my own self pity on my own time...need to round out the day...
Following the Yoga fiasco (except for the WONDERFUL Sue who was ready and raring to go and was let down and disappointed like the G-Star and myself) I made it back to Satan's Lair for an afternoon run with Bastardo:
Training Time:3.06pm
Length of Training Time: 30min 13sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 289
Cal Fat: 23%
Once again I am not hopeful of cracking it (the 100kg mark) this week...quite the contrary...I'm feeling excessively bloated and very underdone...the only hope is that I haven't put on any weight for this week...
Yours in miserable fatness
LBL
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Week 7 - Wednesday 23 June
'Hello my name is (insert name here) and I am a heffalumpa' and so begins the first meeting of fatty fats anonymous... or so says my avid reader Claudia who I was lucky enough to catch up with for lunch today...but we will get to that later...there is SOOOOO much to tell you before that!
The day started like every other over the past 6 and a bit weeks...off to Satan's Lair for a session with the Bastardo and what a session...having missed our last chance training on Saturday - long story blame Bastardo...he decided to 'make it up to us' by having our box a bastard today...it truly is scary how much pain that man can fit into a mere 45mins (I'm sure over the next few weeks I will also learn how much pain the lovely Marie can deliver through one of her RPM classes but we'll get to that later...much, much later!). So how did the session pan out:
Training Time:6.59am
Length of Training Time: 41min 01sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 316
Cal Fat: 29%
In a moment of absolute weakness and mental incapacitation (obviously due in large part to lack of oxygen to the brain through exercise) I had agreed to give a group training session a burl with ma butiful bitch Treva (that's Britny Bitch!) - Treva is, without a doubt GLORIOUS...fit, fabulous and a veritable pocket of luscious fitness freak! Treva was taking a Body Vive class - supposedly low impact, high energy with a LOT of Whoo Hoos thrown in and your fat little loser - me - decided it was time to waddle in to the absolutely terrifying realm of (gulp)....Group Fitness...
Now why do fatties like myself HATE GROUP FITNESS you may well ask...because EVERYONE IS LOOKING AT US AND JUDGING US!!! Now of course you may well argue that in the fit and fabulous world of gymnasiums the only people the fit and fabulous are staring at is...well...themselves. However, we fatties do not see it like that...intimidated, self-conscious and well basically shit scared of making an absolute arse of our fat selves in front of a significant number of people at once usually prevents us (or at least me) from undertaking 'group fitness.' Fortunately for me...the shrine to fatness and my complete lack of any remaining dignity...group fitness is a go for one fat Living Biggest Loser...so off to Body Vive we went....
A combination of cardio, weights, balance and stretching for an hour at a solid slow burn heart rate resulted in the following:
Training Time:9.34am
Length of Training Time: 53min 28sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 450
Cal Fat: 44%
Good effort but let's actually talk about technique...have you ever been privileged enough to witness a heffaluma attempting to do group fitness...it's a hoot...side step touch (trip) step touch side (trip), jump, bounce, grab (fall)...you get the picture. Ma Butiful Bitch Treva is just glorious on his stage leaping and bounding and jumping and singing and whipping (oops sorry being taken back to a club I used to frequent in my younger years...just kidding!)
In spite of the hour of humiliation and embarrassment I successfully saw my way through my first group training session with Treva...yeh for the fat person....
The rest of the day was pretty much spent on work, running (not literally) around and trying to ensure the choices for lunch out today were far superior to the unmitigated disaster from yesterday...Not exactly the week I was anticipating but hey, I'm getting used to that...three more days before weigh in...let's hope I can actually crack it out and pull the ever illusive under 100kg in week 7???
Yours in fatness
LBL
The day started like every other over the past 6 and a bit weeks...off to Satan's Lair for a session with the Bastardo and what a session...having missed our last chance training on Saturday - long story blame Bastardo...he decided to 'make it up to us' by having our box a bastard today...it truly is scary how much pain that man can fit into a mere 45mins (I'm sure over the next few weeks I will also learn how much pain the lovely Marie can deliver through one of her RPM classes but we'll get to that later...much, much later!). So how did the session pan out:
Training Time:6.59am
Length of Training Time: 41min 01sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 316
Cal Fat: 29%
In a moment of absolute weakness and mental incapacitation (obviously due in large part to lack of oxygen to the brain through exercise) I had agreed to give a group training session a burl with ma butiful bitch Treva (that's Britny Bitch!) - Treva is, without a doubt GLORIOUS...fit, fabulous and a veritable pocket of luscious fitness freak! Treva was taking a Body Vive class - supposedly low impact, high energy with a LOT of Whoo Hoos thrown in and your fat little loser - me - decided it was time to waddle in to the absolutely terrifying realm of (gulp)....Group Fitness...
Now why do fatties like myself HATE GROUP FITNESS you may well ask...because EVERYONE IS LOOKING AT US AND JUDGING US!!! Now of course you may well argue that in the fit and fabulous world of gymnasiums the only people the fit and fabulous are staring at is...well...themselves. However, we fatties do not see it like that...intimidated, self-conscious and well basically shit scared of making an absolute arse of our fat selves in front of a significant number of people at once usually prevents us (or at least me) from undertaking 'group fitness.' Fortunately for me...the shrine to fatness and my complete lack of any remaining dignity...group fitness is a go for one fat Living Biggest Loser...so off to Body Vive we went....
A combination of cardio, weights, balance and stretching for an hour at a solid slow burn heart rate resulted in the following:
Training Time:9.34am
Length of Training Time: 53min 28sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 450
Cal Fat: 44%
Good effort but let's actually talk about technique...have you ever been privileged enough to witness a heffaluma attempting to do group fitness...it's a hoot...side step touch (trip) step touch side (trip), jump, bounce, grab (fall)...you get the picture. Ma Butiful Bitch Treva is just glorious on his stage leaping and bounding and jumping and singing and whipping (oops sorry being taken back to a club I used to frequent in my younger years...just kidding!)
In spite of the hour of humiliation and embarrassment I successfully saw my way through my first group training session with Treva...yeh for the fat person....
The rest of the day was pretty much spent on work, running (not literally) around and trying to ensure the choices for lunch out today were far superior to the unmitigated disaster from yesterday...Not exactly the week I was anticipating but hey, I'm getting used to that...three more days before weigh in...let's hope I can actually crack it out and pull the ever illusive under 100kg in week 7???
Yours in fatness
LBL
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Week 7 - Tuesday 22 June
Have you ever wondered why people get FAT? I must admit prior to this circus of a social experiment I hadn't put much time or energy (literally) into trying to figure out how I got to be 112kg at 36 years old.
Don't get me wrong, on occasion (usually when scaring some poor, pimple faced teenager doing casual work at Myer by asking where the fat people's section is) I did curse (rather loudly) my pitiful lot in life to be fat...neither of my parents are fat (there does however appear to be a genetic predisposition to fatness on my mother's side...let's keep perpetuating the family lie and call it Thyroid issues...) but in terms of really analysing my Fatness, so to speak, there had been next to no assessment on the cause or causes.
In simple terms (because let's face it the Biggest Loser LOVES to dumb down the information) fatness is caused by too much in (in terms of fatty, dense, high calorie food) and not enough out (once again, let's keep it clean readers - in terms of energy expenditure...exercise or more fun partnered activities).
However, it isn't as simple as that is it? No matter how hard 'we' try to be 'good' (whatever the hell that may mean) life, capitalism and numerous 'industry' markets all aim to keep us fat (cynically we might think this is a global conspiracy for 'them' to make money??) Where has my holier than thou diatribe stemmed from you may well ask...well here's the story...
Having kicked off the day with a nice sturdy PT session with the lovely G-Star and not so lovely Bastardo we had a real focus on weights (lots of them and heavy...at least for a little fatty like me) the result:
Training Time:7.02am
Length of Training Time: 35min 01sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 276
Cal Fat: 28%
Off to coffee and then home for a quick wardrobe change (gym gear does get excessively stinky)... apparently my car has also gotten in on the ensuring my daily efforts are in excess of what I think is possible...having had some work done on my car over the last few weeks it still wasn't running according to the manual so I thought I would take it back to the Musta for another look see...this is were I learnt my valuable lesson regarding the world ensuring I remain fat...
The Musta needed to have my car for about half an hour to look over so off to the little coffee shop down the road for a nectar of the gods and a mid-morning snack (seeing as it was time for another graze and I wasn't home for my berry delight!)...so into the caloric hellfire I went...determined to make 'good' choices because well...I'm an informed and in control fatty!
Scanning the menu I was a little concerned to see all the full fat items such as bacon and eggs, pancakes, french toast (for a split second I was envisioning myself bathed in butter and maple syrup and wrapped in a layer of french toast...sick but true) but low..there was a faint glimmer on the horizon... a frittata...I make frittata's at home...eggs, a dash of milk..with mushroom, spinach and a bit of fetta...yeh my hips thank you...my visceral fat thanks you my daily caloric intake thanks you!!! So ordered I did...with a smug look on my chubby face and a big fat heart smart tick in my...well heart...I was most pleased.
It's a good time to pause and give my dedicated readers another fat guru tip...ALWAYS ASK HOW THEY MAKE THEIR MEALS BEFORE YOU ORDER...so says your fatness Guru!
So sitting smugly, sipping my no fat, half strength latte in a mug...I waited for my excellent choice of mid-morning snack...and out it comes...all fluffy with hot buttered toast (which was pushed to the side...let's not over indulge now we have made such a good choice). So luxuriating in my excellent healthy choice I was savouring the lovely frittata..mmmm...fluffy....mmmm smooth one might say....what.....f**k....even.....CREAMY....F**k....F**k....F**K!!! Having consumed, oh about 2/3 of the meal, I stopped eating and manically waived the poor little underpaid dish washer over and looking like a possessed crazy women who hasn't had her daily fix of chocolate asked said dish washer...how do you make your frittata?
Now, I do acknowledge that it probably would have been a smarter, more informed move to have asked this question PRIOR to ordering the frittata but hey...go figure...I was unaware that there is an insidious movement afoot specially tasked with...well...KEEPING ME FAT! With a scared look in his eye (probably due to the twitching and nervous shakes I was displaying) said dishwasher scuttled off to get the 'Manager'...
carefully approaching the crazy woman's table the Manager asks if everything is 'alright'...'No' I wanted to shout 'Everything IS NOT F**KING alright...I think I have just eaten a week's worth of calories in one sitting AND might I add, IT WASN'T VERY NICE!' However, my more tempered response was..."How do you make your frittata's?' 'Oh ho ho...' says the rather rotund Manager...'You probably thought that was a really good option hey ...we make it with 3 eggs and 1/3 of a cup of thickened CREAM to make it...well...nice and CREAMY!'
Exfat me? Did he just say CREAM??? Has my hearing been adversely affected by all this damn exercise??? CREAM....CREAM....C....R.....E......A......M! A creamy, molten rage started to seethe through me...how is a fat person attempting to actually live whilst losing weight supposed to navigate their way through shit like this???
Having paid the still chuckling (and well let's face it FAT Manager) I headed back with a churning stomach to get my car. Fortunately or unfortunately whichever way you wish to look at it...my car was going to be in the shop for at least a day or two...so with no other alternative but my fat little self, it was walking in order to get home! Now this may not seem like much of an effort but I need to put a little perspective around it...the walk home was somewhere in the vicinity of 8km - burn damn cream....B......U.....R......N. The result:
Training Time:10.43am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 37min 43sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 563
Cal Fat: 41%
Having locked myself out of the house, the G-Star found me laying postrate on the garage floor, comatose and in desperate need of well... a new body (no shit Sherlock! isn't that why you're doing this??)
That was pretty much me spent for the day...unable to stand vertically let alone move an afternoon run with Bastardo was a distant nightmare (that leaves me in a pool of sweat)...so all in all the day was a complete bust...fat people the world over really should unite in a show of well unity against those bastard restaurants determined to f**k up our caloric intakes for the day...week...month...year...
Yours in 'creamy' fatness
LBL
Don't get me wrong, on occasion (usually when scaring some poor, pimple faced teenager doing casual work at Myer by asking where the fat people's section is) I did curse (rather loudly) my pitiful lot in life to be fat...neither of my parents are fat (there does however appear to be a genetic predisposition to fatness on my mother's side...let's keep perpetuating the family lie and call it Thyroid issues...) but in terms of really analysing my Fatness, so to speak, there had been next to no assessment on the cause or causes.
In simple terms (because let's face it the Biggest Loser LOVES to dumb down the information) fatness is caused by too much in (in terms of fatty, dense, high calorie food) and not enough out (once again, let's keep it clean readers - in terms of energy expenditure...exercise or more fun partnered activities).
However, it isn't as simple as that is it? No matter how hard 'we' try to be 'good' (whatever the hell that may mean) life, capitalism and numerous 'industry' markets all aim to keep us fat (cynically we might think this is a global conspiracy for 'them' to make money??) Where has my holier than thou diatribe stemmed from you may well ask...well here's the story...
Having kicked off the day with a nice sturdy PT session with the lovely G-Star and not so lovely Bastardo we had a real focus on weights (lots of them and heavy...at least for a little fatty like me) the result:
Training Time:7.02am
Length of Training Time: 35min 01sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 276
Cal Fat: 28%
Off to coffee and then home for a quick wardrobe change (gym gear does get excessively stinky)... apparently my car has also gotten in on the ensuring my daily efforts are in excess of what I think is possible...having had some work done on my car over the last few weeks it still wasn't running according to the manual so I thought I would take it back to the Musta for another look see...this is were I learnt my valuable lesson regarding the world ensuring I remain fat...
The Musta needed to have my car for about half an hour to look over so off to the little coffee shop down the road for a nectar of the gods and a mid-morning snack (seeing as it was time for another graze and I wasn't home for my berry delight!)...so into the caloric hellfire I went...determined to make 'good' choices because well...I'm an informed and in control fatty!
Scanning the menu I was a little concerned to see all the full fat items such as bacon and eggs, pancakes, french toast (for a split second I was envisioning myself bathed in butter and maple syrup and wrapped in a layer of french toast...sick but true) but low..there was a faint glimmer on the horizon... a frittata...I make frittata's at home...eggs, a dash of milk..with mushroom, spinach and a bit of fetta...yeh my hips thank you...my visceral fat thanks you my daily caloric intake thanks you!!! So ordered I did...with a smug look on my chubby face and a big fat heart smart tick in my...well heart...I was most pleased.
It's a good time to pause and give my dedicated readers another fat guru tip...ALWAYS ASK HOW THEY MAKE THEIR MEALS BEFORE YOU ORDER...so says your fatness Guru!
So sitting smugly, sipping my no fat, half strength latte in a mug...I waited for my excellent choice of mid-morning snack...and out it comes...all fluffy with hot buttered toast (which was pushed to the side...let's not over indulge now we have made such a good choice). So luxuriating in my excellent healthy choice I was savouring the lovely frittata..mmmm...fluffy....mmmm smooth one might say....what.....f**k....even.....CREAMY....F**k....F**k....F**K!!! Having consumed, oh about 2/3 of the meal, I stopped eating and manically waived the poor little underpaid dish washer over and looking like a possessed crazy women who hasn't had her daily fix of chocolate asked said dish washer...how do you make your frittata?
Now, I do acknowledge that it probably would have been a smarter, more informed move to have asked this question PRIOR to ordering the frittata but hey...go figure...I was unaware that there is an insidious movement afoot specially tasked with...well...KEEPING ME FAT! With a scared look in his eye (probably due to the twitching and nervous shakes I was displaying) said dishwasher scuttled off to get the 'Manager'...
carefully approaching the crazy woman's table the Manager asks if everything is 'alright'...'No' I wanted to shout 'Everything IS NOT F**KING alright...I think I have just eaten a week's worth of calories in one sitting AND might I add, IT WASN'T VERY NICE!' However, my more tempered response was..."How do you make your frittata's?' 'Oh ho ho...' says the rather rotund Manager...'You probably thought that was a really good option hey ...we make it with 3 eggs and 1/3 of a cup of thickened CREAM to make it...well...nice and CREAMY!'
Exfat me? Did he just say CREAM??? Has my hearing been adversely affected by all this damn exercise??? CREAM....CREAM....C....R.....E......A......M! A creamy, molten rage started to seethe through me...how is a fat person attempting to actually live whilst losing weight supposed to navigate their way through shit like this???
Having paid the still chuckling (and well let's face it FAT Manager) I headed back with a churning stomach to get my car. Fortunately or unfortunately whichever way you wish to look at it...my car was going to be in the shop for at least a day or two...so with no other alternative but my fat little self, it was walking in order to get home! Now this may not seem like much of an effort but I need to put a little perspective around it...the walk home was somewhere in the vicinity of 8km - burn damn cream....B......U.....R......N. The result:
Training Time:10.43am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 37min 43sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 563
Cal Fat: 41%
Having locked myself out of the house, the G-Star found me laying postrate on the garage floor, comatose and in desperate need of well... a new body (no shit Sherlock! isn't that why you're doing this??)
That was pretty much me spent for the day...unable to stand vertically let alone move an afternoon run with Bastardo was a distant nightmare (that leaves me in a pool of sweat)...so all in all the day was a complete bust...fat people the world over really should unite in a show of well unity against those bastard restaurants determined to f**k up our caloric intakes for the day...week...month...year...
Yours in 'creamy' fatness
LBL
Monday, June 21, 2010
Week 7 - Monday 21 June
A New Attitude (wasn't that a Donna Summers song?) that's what is called for as we enter week 7...my dismal weight loss to date has left me feeling somewhat of a 'loser' and not in a good sense with a weight loss for the first 6 weeks of the competition placing me a serious last.
I must admit I am finding it incredibly challenging to get my head around the 4-6 hours of exercise per day (7 days per week) particularly given that the bulk of that time the Biggest Loser contestants are required to train themselves to an intensity that will result in massive weight loss.
OK coming clean my food intake has not over the past 6 weeks been 100% without a doubt the most perfect caloric intake choices possible...I still have a hankering for my organic butter (mmmm b...u....t....t...e.....r) and in spite of the 'loser' mantra that carbs are bad I have still been incorporating a certain level of carbs in my diet. Still having serves of potato, rice, cous cous etc but in my defence (if I really require one) my portion sizes have been exceptionally good.
Today started out with a plan (not a good one and not a written down one...which as we will find out is a major problem) but a plan none the less. The plan was to crack out 4 hours (doesn't this sound like a broken record???) So off to Satan's Lair at 7.00am...
Training Time:7.08am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 01min 19sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 605
Cal Fat: 22%
We're off and running (literally and figuratively) so needing to stick to the ethereal plan...headed back to Satan's Lair for a slow burn:
Training Time:11.19am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 08sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 538
Cal Fat: 27%
Two hours down...two to go....oh my evil plan is coming together....and that's when it all fell apart...
Having laid down for my Nana nap was the death knell of 'The Plan' for the day...could have seen that coming couldn't you...having slept (fitfully) for an hour and a half it took every ounce of my being to drag my fat sorry arse out of bed and back to Satan's Lair for a run with the G-Star...
Training Time:4.04pm
Length of Training Time: 35min 13sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 394
Cal Fat: 25%
And that was the end of it...my legs rendered virtually useless to carry my still hefty frame mind and body... or maybe just mind telling the body...that was me for the day...oh the ever elusive 4hours...let's not even dare to dream about 5 or 6 hours...that's just crazy talk!
The day rounded out with a food blow out of Wholegrain Premiums (8 in total) with organic butter (mmmmm b....u....t.....t.....e.....r) and Vegemite.....
All in all another crap day NOT in the house....until tomorrow
Yours in fatness
LBL
I must admit I am finding it incredibly challenging to get my head around the 4-6 hours of exercise per day (7 days per week) particularly given that the bulk of that time the Biggest Loser contestants are required to train themselves to an intensity that will result in massive weight loss.
OK coming clean my food intake has not over the past 6 weeks been 100% without a doubt the most perfect caloric intake choices possible...I still have a hankering for my organic butter (mmmm b...u....t....t...e.....r) and in spite of the 'loser' mantra that carbs are bad I have still been incorporating a certain level of carbs in my diet. Still having serves of potato, rice, cous cous etc but in my defence (if I really require one) my portion sizes have been exceptionally good.
Today started out with a plan (not a good one and not a written down one...which as we will find out is a major problem) but a plan none the less. The plan was to crack out 4 hours (doesn't this sound like a broken record???) So off to Satan's Lair at 7.00am...
Training Time:7.08am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 01min 19sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 605
Cal Fat: 22%
We're off and running (literally and figuratively) so needing to stick to the ethereal plan...headed back to Satan's Lair for a slow burn:
Training Time:11.19am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 08sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 538
Cal Fat: 27%
Two hours down...two to go....oh my evil plan is coming together....and that's when it all fell apart...
Having laid down for my Nana nap was the death knell of 'The Plan' for the day...could have seen that coming couldn't you...having slept (fitfully) for an hour and a half it took every ounce of my being to drag my fat sorry arse out of bed and back to Satan's Lair for a run with the G-Star...
Training Time:4.04pm
Length of Training Time: 35min 13sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 394
Cal Fat: 25%
And that was the end of it...my legs rendered virtually useless to carry my still hefty frame mind and body... or maybe just mind telling the body...that was me for the day...oh the ever elusive 4hours...let's not even dare to dream about 5 or 6 hours...that's just crazy talk!
The day rounded out with a food blow out of Wholegrain Premiums (8 in total) with organic butter (mmmmm b....u....t.....t.....e.....r) and Vegemite.....
All in all another crap day NOT in the house....until tomorrow
Yours in fatness
LBL
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Sunday 20 June - Weigh In Week 6
Oh My G.....O......D!!! I am officially the Cameron, Shannon or no, don't say it ....Joele of this Biggest Loser competition. I just haven't got it!! Sorry probably should start from the beginning...weigh in day and once again the weight loss for the week has put me in the very, very....VERY last possible position in the Australian Competition...
Australian Competition Week 6
Given that the 2010 Australian Competition ran for 12 weeks (unlike the US that runs for 18 weeks) we can safely say at this particular juncture that, well...basically...I'm screwed!!!
Alright, so the G-Star is big on the 'that's incredible...another 1.5kg....9kg in six weeks' etc etc and no doubt in my mind that is EXACTLY what the G-Star is supposed to say under the circumstances BUT that doesn't make me any more competitive. Let's look at this another way...the winner of the 2010 Australian Series by week six had lost a grand total of 32.0kg...puts it in perspective for you doesn't it!!!
On the other note, am still marginally competitive in the US Competition:
US Competition
Alright, we can have all the arguments in the world about sound, stable, small weight loss each week BUT THAT WASN'T THE POINT OF THIS EXPERIMENT!
So what do I mean I have become...(gulp) the Cameron, Megan or (bigger gulp) Joele of this competition... Every Biggest Loser series has one...sometimes maybe two or three...the people who just don't get it...they spend the first 6,8,10 weeks bemoaning their fat fate, whining for their home, their families, their food and well basically losing little weight and doing very little exercise other than what is required of them for the filming of the show...this is me....
Over the last six weeks I have highlighted to you all that I've trained...and I have just not as much as I need to be...I eaten well...and I have...just not as much as I need to be and I've lived the Biggest Loser...and I have to a certain extent but certainly not to the limits I need to in order to prove or disprove the 'success' of weight loss Biggest Loser style.
So, like some of the other contestants, I have had an epiphany of sorts and from Monday (tomorrow) it comes in to play...no more fluffing around, no more half ways and maybe sos...we are in week 7, there are 10 weeks til grand finale, challenges and temptation will abound over the coming weeks (G-Star's Birthday, trip to Melbourne etc etc) and I have GOT to do this...so from this point on, everything is ramping up ten notches...no more excuses and fat person justifications this is it...
Until tomorrow, yours in fatness...
LBL
Australian Competition Week 6
Given that the 2010 Australian Competition ran for 12 weeks (unlike the US that runs for 18 weeks) we can safely say at this particular juncture that, well...basically...I'm screwed!!!
Alright, so the G-Star is big on the 'that's incredible...another 1.5kg....9kg in six weeks' etc etc and no doubt in my mind that is EXACTLY what the G-Star is supposed to say under the circumstances BUT that doesn't make me any more competitive. Let's look at this another way...the winner of the 2010 Australian Series by week six had lost a grand total of 32.0kg...puts it in perspective for you doesn't it!!!
On the other note, am still marginally competitive in the US Competition:
US Competition
Alright, we can have all the arguments in the world about sound, stable, small weight loss each week BUT THAT WASN'T THE POINT OF THIS EXPERIMENT!
So what do I mean I have become...(gulp) the Cameron, Megan or (bigger gulp) Joele of this competition... Every Biggest Loser series has one...sometimes maybe two or three...the people who just don't get it...they spend the first 6,8,10 weeks bemoaning their fat fate, whining for their home, their families, their food and well basically losing little weight and doing very little exercise other than what is required of them for the filming of the show...this is me....
Over the last six weeks I have highlighted to you all that I've trained...and I have just not as much as I need to be...I eaten well...and I have...just not as much as I need to be and I've lived the Biggest Loser...and I have to a certain extent but certainly not to the limits I need to in order to prove or disprove the 'success' of weight loss Biggest Loser style.
So, like some of the other contestants, I have had an epiphany of sorts and from Monday (tomorrow) it comes in to play...no more fluffing around, no more half ways and maybe sos...we are in week 7, there are 10 weeks til grand finale, challenges and temptation will abound over the coming weeks (G-Star's Birthday, trip to Melbourne etc etc) and I have GOT to do this...so from this point on, everything is ramping up ten notches...no more excuses and fat person justifications this is it...
Until tomorrow, yours in fatness...
LBL
Friday, June 18, 2010
Week 6 - Friday 18 June
Well this is going to be a quick entry...the entire day was a complete and utter write off!
Succumbed to temptation...ate Pizza for lunch, had a chocolate and only did a PT session (although an incredibly shitty PT session) with the Bastardo...result:
Training Time:7.03am
Length of Training Time: 39min 42sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 274
Cal Fat: 33%
Other than luxuriating in a wonderful massage with Mo (my masseuse has the hands of a goddess) that was my day...read book...had all the best intentions and completely let myself down (and everyone else for that matter)...the next few days is going to be about planning and execution...you'll understand what I mean as we go on...so on the dismal note its goodnight...
Yours in fatness
LBL
Succumbed to temptation...ate Pizza for lunch, had a chocolate and only did a PT session (although an incredibly shitty PT session) with the Bastardo...result:
Training Time:7.03am
Length of Training Time: 39min 42sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 274
Cal Fat: 33%
Other than luxuriating in a wonderful massage with Mo (my masseuse has the hands of a goddess) that was my day...read book...had all the best intentions and completely let myself down (and everyone else for that matter)...the next few days is going to be about planning and execution...you'll understand what I mean as we go on...so on the dismal note its goodnight...
Yours in fatness
LBL
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Week 6 - Thursday 17 June
You know some days you just don't feel like it...whatever it may be...most of us have days where the thought of going to work simply renders us unable to move, speak or even remotely resemble a human being in any way shape or form...well this was pretty much the morning I woke up to...I haven't been sleeping well...I don't know why...it certainly can't be stress...Yes I admit that I am even dreaming Biggest Loser but I can assure you that has more to do with the luscious Jillian (and given this is a PG blog I really can't elaborate) than some sub-conscious anxiety relating to this insanity that I have embarked upon.
Not sleeping well I am finding is really adversely affecting my mental state and as a result my training efforts...so suffice to say given we weren't due for a PT session with Bastardo until the afternoon, the morning was spent, well pretty much doing f**k all. Pottered around the house, talked myself out of actually doing any exercise...too tired...too cranky...already done too much this week...you know the story, we've been here before in the last few weeks...even copped a mid-morning Nana nap...but before I could lower myself to the level of watching Oprah I actually decided enough was enough and put on my togs and headed to the pool...once again the pool was freezing but in spite of that I cracked out a whopping (at least for me) 3km which resulted in the following:
Training Time:2.13pm
Length of Training Time: 1hour 07min 43sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 580
Cal Fat: 27%
Unfortunately (or fortunately whichever way you might want to look at it) I had to head straight to Satan's Lair for a training session with the Bastardo...now I know that I have mentioned previously that the Bastardo has (to my way of thinking) upped the anti somewhat over the past few days but I think that is...well basically...A F***ING UNDERSTATEMENT. As previously mentioned, he is trying to kill me (and take the G-Star along for the sadistic ride)...so if over the next few weeks you read my obituary in the Trashy Mail...point the police in his direction (you have been warned Rod!!!)
As usual, not satisfied with sucking all the oxygen from my brain and rendering me virtually comatose... the Bastardo decided that I evidently also required a strong dose of cardiac arrest on the dreadmill...the result...death by exercise and the following:
Training Time:4.01pm
Length of Training Time: 51min 34sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 483
Cal Fat: 25%
So having crawled my way out of Satan's Lair in a pool of sweat and tears (saying good-bye to the other illustrious staff of Satan's Lair - the Marcinator and Psycho- there is no way in hell I'm doing your RPM class- Jess) I headed home somewhat satisfied that I had actually gone some way to redeeming what had started out as being a pretty lack lustre day...
Yours in fatness
LBL
Not sleeping well I am finding is really adversely affecting my mental state and as a result my training efforts...so suffice to say given we weren't due for a PT session with Bastardo until the afternoon, the morning was spent, well pretty much doing f**k all. Pottered around the house, talked myself out of actually doing any exercise...too tired...too cranky...already done too much this week...you know the story, we've been here before in the last few weeks...even copped a mid-morning Nana nap...but before I could lower myself to the level of watching Oprah I actually decided enough was enough and put on my togs and headed to the pool...once again the pool was freezing but in spite of that I cracked out a whopping (at least for me) 3km which resulted in the following:
Training Time:2.13pm
Length of Training Time: 1hour 07min 43sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 580
Cal Fat: 27%
Unfortunately (or fortunately whichever way you might want to look at it) I had to head straight to Satan's Lair for a training session with the Bastardo...now I know that I have mentioned previously that the Bastardo has (to my way of thinking) upped the anti somewhat over the past few days but I think that is...well basically...A F***ING UNDERSTATEMENT. As previously mentioned, he is trying to kill me (and take the G-Star along for the sadistic ride)...so if over the next few weeks you read my obituary in the Trashy Mail...point the police in his direction (you have been warned Rod!!!)
As usual, not satisfied with sucking all the oxygen from my brain and rendering me virtually comatose... the Bastardo decided that I evidently also required a strong dose of cardiac arrest on the dreadmill...the result...death by exercise and the following:
Training Time:4.01pm
Length of Training Time: 51min 34sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 483
Cal Fat: 25%
So having crawled my way out of Satan's Lair in a pool of sweat and tears (saying good-bye to the other illustrious staff of Satan's Lair - the Marcinator and Psycho- there is no way in hell I'm doing your RPM class- Jess) I headed home somewhat satisfied that I had actually gone some way to redeeming what had started out as being a pretty lack lustre day...
Yours in fatness
LBL
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Week 6 - Wednesday 16 June
Well the day was a bit of a wash with should have dones and would have dones...after a hideous night's sleep I postponed training to a more reasonable hour of 9.30am...so waddling off to Satan's Lair at around 9.00am for a warm up on the dreadmill and then into a PT session with the Bastardo who has officially admitted in sworn testimony that he is trying to kill me...a slow, painful, tortuous death by exercise!
The morning's session went pretty much according to plan with the net result being:
Training Time:9.03am
Length of Training Time: 50min 01sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 463
Cal Fat: 25%
The highlight of the day was another catch up with my Biggest Loser Guru, Sharif, over a nice cup of coffee...picked his brain again about a number of perceptions regarding the in house 'show' and found out some interesting tit bits of information relating to their exercise and eating regimes. It was somewhat comforting to learn that despite what the television show infers the contestants aren't up and running at 20km/h in their first week or even in their first 10weeks for some of them...some contestants don't even hit about 30sec sprints at 12km/h for the entire competition...oh the power of television. Another interesting piece of advice that Sharif gave was that the 'challenges' were/are purely about 'entertainment' value and have very little fat/calorie burn involved due to the inordinate amount of time it takes to film them...this appears to be another interesting differentiation between the Australian and US versions of the show as having watched the challenge set down for the contestants last night (a challenge which involved climbing the stairs of an 8+ story building) it would appear that if I want to bring challenges into the game I will need to devise something with G-Star and Bastardo that will burn calories as well as provide comedic relief for them and my followers....
Have I mentioned that the shrine has been officially established at Satan's Lair and is, well let's not put any shine on it...absolutely pathetic...I look fat and miserable...very Biggest Loseresc.
Once again back to the day that was...having the best intentions in the world I headed to the pool following my coffee with Sharif...to this end I was thwarted by the recollection that we had a rental inspection due in the afternoon...so no swim and back home to wait for the real estate agent.
The last task of the day was obviously my daily dose of cardiac arrest (sorry I meant running) with the Bastardo...how much did I NOT WANT TO DO THIS???? If you don't know...let me tell you....A LOT!!!!!
In spite of that, onto the dreadmill I went the result of which was:
Training Time:4.06am
Length of Training Time: 25min 09sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 232
Cal Fat: 25%
All in all a most ORDINARY day...I do hope complacency isn't setting in and I am getting too comfortable with my slow (minimal) weight loss efforts over the last 5 weeks...little increments does not a Biggest Loser make!!!
This mind set crap is really doing my head in at the moment with a real 'I don't wanna!" attitude to match the various and colourful profanities that continually escape my mouth (when I can actually gasp enough breath) whilst at Satan's Lair...
I think it's time I consider finding a psychologist to have a chat to and see if I can't get this head shit sorted a bit better for the remaining 10weeks of the challenge???
Until tomorrow...yours in fatness
LBL
The morning's session went pretty much according to plan with the net result being:
Training Time:9.03am
Length of Training Time: 50min 01sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 463
Cal Fat: 25%
The highlight of the day was another catch up with my Biggest Loser Guru, Sharif, over a nice cup of coffee...picked his brain again about a number of perceptions regarding the in house 'show' and found out some interesting tit bits of information relating to their exercise and eating regimes. It was somewhat comforting to learn that despite what the television show infers the contestants aren't up and running at 20km/h in their first week or even in their first 10weeks for some of them...some contestants don't even hit about 30sec sprints at 12km/h for the entire competition...oh the power of television. Another interesting piece of advice that Sharif gave was that the 'challenges' were/are purely about 'entertainment' value and have very little fat/calorie burn involved due to the inordinate amount of time it takes to film them...this appears to be another interesting differentiation between the Australian and US versions of the show as having watched the challenge set down for the contestants last night (a challenge which involved climbing the stairs of an 8+ story building) it would appear that if I want to bring challenges into the game I will need to devise something with G-Star and Bastardo that will burn calories as well as provide comedic relief for them and my followers....
Have I mentioned that the shrine has been officially established at Satan's Lair and is, well let's not put any shine on it...absolutely pathetic...I look fat and miserable...very Biggest Loseresc.
Once again back to the day that was...having the best intentions in the world I headed to the pool following my coffee with Sharif...to this end I was thwarted by the recollection that we had a rental inspection due in the afternoon...so no swim and back home to wait for the real estate agent.
The last task of the day was obviously my daily dose of cardiac arrest (sorry I meant running) with the Bastardo...how much did I NOT WANT TO DO THIS???? If you don't know...let me tell you....A LOT!!!!!
In spite of that, onto the dreadmill I went the result of which was:
Training Time:4.06am
Length of Training Time: 25min 09sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 232
Cal Fat: 25%
All in all a most ORDINARY day...I do hope complacency isn't setting in and I am getting too comfortable with my slow (minimal) weight loss efforts over the last 5 weeks...little increments does not a Biggest Loser make!!!
This mind set crap is really doing my head in at the moment with a real 'I don't wanna!" attitude to match the various and colourful profanities that continually escape my mouth (when I can actually gasp enough breath) whilst at Satan's Lair...
I think it's time I consider finding a psychologist to have a chat to and see if I can't get this head shit sorted a bit better for the remaining 10weeks of the challenge???
Until tomorrow...yours in fatness
LBL
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Week 6 - Tuesday 15 June
Did you know that Foxtel (You Lifestyle Channel to be exact) have started running a very old season of Biggest Loser US? It kicked off last night at 7.30pm so, as you can imagine, I am diligently watching the series for inspiration (obviously not from the contestants but from the luscious Jillian) and to get a gauge on just how this game is played. Just for shits and giggles I am putting in a link to this entry of an absolutely hysterical melt down that US trainer Bob had with one of the contestant (Joelle) in a previous season...suffice to say I haven't pushed Bastardo to this point yet but I am sure it's coming...
Bobs Meltdown
Another 'new' thing that I am going to start including in each entry is the actual details of the workouts I am doing as opposed to just the results (as per the heart rate monitor)...this should provide for interesting fodder in terms of gauging how much or how little I am actually doing as each day passes by.
So with that in mind...let's look at today's activities:
The morning started out with a warm up on the treadmill of 15min. This consisted of the following interval training:
Given the lack of oxygen that was obviously not making its way to my brain this area of the workout has become somewhat fuzzy but did entail squats with a 6kg medicine ball, weights of a myriad of shapes and sizes and just to add insult to injury two stints on the cross trainer and stepper - the inventor of whom G-Star and I am currently attempting to take a contract hit out on!
The Result:
Training Time:9.10am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 02min 42sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 593
Cal Fat: 24%
From Satan's Lair we rewarded ourselves with the nectar of the God's (mmm coffee) and then headed home for a regroup.
Next on the agenda was a swim given our pitiful efforts in the pool over the last two weeks. For the record can we all repeat after me....heated pool my arse!
My swimming regime consists of a solid, slow burn (weightless - yeh) session of the following:
10 laps freestyle (non stop) - attempt to keep HR at about 140
10 laps sprints (up 25m kicking on back then sprint 25m freestyle - repeat)
I rotate this for the hour swim with the results being:
Training Time:2.02pm
Length of Training Time: 1hour 06sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 573
Cal Fat: 24%
Finally finished out the day with a run with Bastardo - once again due to the lack of oxygen flowing to my brain I can't remember the finer details of the torture but it went something along these lines:
2min warm up @ 5.5km/h
1min run @ 8.5km/h
1min walk @ 6.0km/h
2min walk @ 6.0km/h at 15%incline
1min walk @ 6.0km/h
1min run @ 8.5km/h
2min walk @ 5.5km/h @ 15%incline
1min walk @ 5.0km/h @ 15%incline
(well you get the picture...the Bastard simply keeps rotating the torture dependent on my HR...a fun time was had by all....NOT) result:
Training Time:4.11pm
Length of Training Time: 31min 37sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 357
Cal Fat: 17%
So that basically rounded out the day...the fact that I was rendered virtually comatose... a victory for the Bastardo!
All in all a halfway decent day!
Yours in fatness
LBL
Bobs Meltdown
Another 'new' thing that I am going to start including in each entry is the actual details of the workouts I am doing as opposed to just the results (as per the heart rate monitor)...this should provide for interesting fodder in terms of gauging how much or how little I am actually doing as each day passes by.
So with that in mind...let's look at today's activities:
The morning started out with a warm up on the treadmill of 15min. This consisted of the following interval training:
- 2min warm up @5.0km/h - 0%incline
- 1min run @8.0km/hr - 0%incline
- 1min walk @5.5km/hr - 0%incline
- 2min walk @5.5km.hr - 15%incline
- 1min walk @6.0km/hr - 0%incline
- 1min run @8.5km/hr - 0%incline
- 1min walk@6.0km/hr - 0%incline
- 2min walk @6.0km/hr - 15%incline
- 1min walk @5.5km/hr - 0%incline
- 1min run @9.0km/hr - 0% incline
- 2min walk@5.5km/hr - 0% incline
Given the lack of oxygen that was obviously not making its way to my brain this area of the workout has become somewhat fuzzy but did entail squats with a 6kg medicine ball, weights of a myriad of shapes and sizes and just to add insult to injury two stints on the cross trainer and stepper - the inventor of whom G-Star and I am currently attempting to take a contract hit out on!
The Result:
Training Time:9.10am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 02min 42sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 593
Cal Fat: 24%
From Satan's Lair we rewarded ourselves with the nectar of the God's (mmm coffee) and then headed home for a regroup.
Next on the agenda was a swim given our pitiful efforts in the pool over the last two weeks. For the record can we all repeat after me....heated pool my arse!
My swimming regime consists of a solid, slow burn (weightless - yeh) session of the following:
10 laps freestyle (non stop) - attempt to keep HR at about 140
10 laps sprints (up 25m kicking on back then sprint 25m freestyle - repeat)
I rotate this for the hour swim with the results being:
Training Time:2.02pm
Length of Training Time: 1hour 06sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 573
Cal Fat: 24%
Finally finished out the day with a run with Bastardo - once again due to the lack of oxygen flowing to my brain I can't remember the finer details of the torture but it went something along these lines:
2min warm up @ 5.5km/h
1min run @ 8.5km/h
1min walk @ 6.0km/h
2min walk @ 6.0km/h at 15%incline
1min walk @ 6.0km/h
1min run @ 8.5km/h
2min walk @ 5.5km/h @ 15%incline
1min walk @ 5.0km/h @ 15%incline
(well you get the picture...the Bastard simply keeps rotating the torture dependent on my HR...a fun time was had by all....NOT) result:
Training Time:4.11pm
Length of Training Time: 31min 37sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 357
Cal Fat: 17%
So that basically rounded out the day...the fact that I was rendered virtually comatose... a victory for the Bastardo!
All in all a halfway decent day!
Yours in fatness
LBL
Monday, June 14, 2010
Week 6 - Monday 14 June
Well a bit of a ho-hum day really...I think it's all too easy to become a little bit complacent following a weigh in that resulted in a somewhat decent loss. This combined with the fact that it was a public holiday, Satan's Lair was only opened for a shortened day and the Bastardo was off gallivanting the countryside with his woman and one could be excused (not really) for a bit of a take it easy day...not a positive kick off to a week that I want to result in the final achievement of under 100kg!
The able bodied G-Star took up the Hellfire Mistress Princess of Darkness mantle for the morning gym session and unfortunately relished in the position...her personal training efforts resulting in the following for the morning:
Training Time:9.10am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 02min 42sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 593
Cal Fat: 24%
Having then mentally prepared myself to hit the water for another hour cardio I was officially pissed to find the pool closed for the public holiday (a new phenomenon by all accounts as previously the only day the f***ing pool has been closed is bloody Christmas Day but apparently the Y generation have developed some new sort of reverence for our illustrious monarch and felt that they needed to celebrate her birthday by closing the pool in which fatties like myself attempt to exercise).
So with the gym closed and the pool closed I have to make the public admission that I did absolutely nothing else for the day and do hold the opinion that it was a pretty piss poor start to week six.
On another note, it would appear that progressively I am replacing my normal reward for good work mechanism...food/eating with a far more 'healthy' and one might say costly alternative. I thought at the end of week 5 and with 7.5kg off of my belt (so to speak) I should reward myself in some way that would not undo my caloric intake for the month (however much that bastard Colonel Sanders and his evil 11 herbs and spices were calling). To that end I made my way to the beautiful Ben (Manager of Athletes Foot at Carindale) and made, hold your breath and turn blue...a sporting purchase as a reward...what you say is she mad??? Well I think we've firmly established that by now...but the purchase I made was a pair of completely useless, will never be worn in the gym but utterly gorgeous and very comfortable Nike Frees (black...very slimming on my rapidly less fattened feet and toes).
So thinking about purchases it occurred to me that I haven't really discussed my 'Dream Outfit' with my committed readers...this may come as a bit of a surprise but the dream outfit is actually quite simple and unassuming and consists of the following:
1 pair of Levi 501 jeans size 14
1 bonds singlet size 12/14
1 pair of RM Williams Snake Skin Boots (brown) - god only knows what size given its only my feet and tits that appear to be losing any weight at the moment.
So with that now out in the open, I need to carry out some further research on which week the dream outfit needs to be trotted out...also need to investigate the challenge concept that I previously mentioned...lots to think about and do...too tired to concentrate anymore so...
Until tomorrow...Yours in fatness...
LBL
The able bodied G-Star took up the Hellfire Mistress Princess of Darkness mantle for the morning gym session and unfortunately relished in the position...her personal training efforts resulting in the following for the morning:
Training Time:9.10am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 02min 42sec
Intensity: 2-3
Calories Burnt: 593
Cal Fat: 24%
Having then mentally prepared myself to hit the water for another hour cardio I was officially pissed to find the pool closed for the public holiday (a new phenomenon by all accounts as previously the only day the f***ing pool has been closed is bloody Christmas Day but apparently the Y generation have developed some new sort of reverence for our illustrious monarch and felt that they needed to celebrate her birthday by closing the pool in which fatties like myself attempt to exercise).
So with the gym closed and the pool closed I have to make the public admission that I did absolutely nothing else for the day and do hold the opinion that it was a pretty piss poor start to week six.
On another note, it would appear that progressively I am replacing my normal reward for good work mechanism...food/eating with a far more 'healthy' and one might say costly alternative. I thought at the end of week 5 and with 7.5kg off of my belt (so to speak) I should reward myself in some way that would not undo my caloric intake for the month (however much that bastard Colonel Sanders and his evil 11 herbs and spices were calling). To that end I made my way to the beautiful Ben (Manager of Athletes Foot at Carindale) and made, hold your breath and turn blue...a sporting purchase as a reward...what you say is she mad??? Well I think we've firmly established that by now...but the purchase I made was a pair of completely useless, will never be worn in the gym but utterly gorgeous and very comfortable Nike Frees (black...very slimming on my rapidly less fattened feet and toes).
So thinking about purchases it occurred to me that I haven't really discussed my 'Dream Outfit' with my committed readers...this may come as a bit of a surprise but the dream outfit is actually quite simple and unassuming and consists of the following:
1 pair of Levi 501 jeans size 14
1 bonds singlet size 12/14
1 pair of RM Williams Snake Skin Boots (brown) - god only knows what size given its only my feet and tits that appear to be losing any weight at the moment.
So with that now out in the open, I need to carry out some further research on which week the dream outfit needs to be trotted out...also need to investigate the challenge concept that I previously mentioned...lots to think about and do...too tired to concentrate anymore so...
Until tomorrow...Yours in fatness...
LBL
Sunday, June 13, 2010
The Worming Incident of 2010
Will the humiliation never end??? Does every single company in the world have it written in their strategic plans that ritual, on-going humiliation of fat people is a mandatory KPI (key performance indicator) for success??
Where has this stemmed from you may ask????
Well, the G-Star decided that thanks to the household aristocrats (Claude and Vincent our Australian Silky Terrorists) the entire family needed to be well....wormed. A simple enough concept you might say but apparently for a fat person...well let the ritual humiliation begin... did you know that worming tablets are based on weight??? Well they are and what do you think that means...it means that fatty bomb batty me required well basically the entire packet of worming tablets...well OK not quite because just to insult your fatness as much as possible the makers of the worming tablets highlight that if you are over 70kg (well basically you're too fat to be wormed and well maybe having worms might be a good thing for you huh??) and that you need to take 7 that's right 7 squares of foul tasting 'chocolate' tablets.....
From hence forth this will be known as the Worming Incident of 2010...not happy G-Star....
Where has this stemmed from you may ask????
Well, the G-Star decided that thanks to the household aristocrats (Claude and Vincent our Australian Silky Terrorists) the entire family needed to be well....wormed. A simple enough concept you might say but apparently for a fat person...well let the ritual humiliation begin... did you know that worming tablets are based on weight??? Well they are and what do you think that means...it means that fatty bomb batty me required well basically the entire packet of worming tablets...well OK not quite because just to insult your fatness as much as possible the makers of the worming tablets highlight that if you are over 70kg (well basically you're too fat to be wormed and well maybe having worms might be a good thing for you huh??) and that you need to take 7 that's right 7 squares of foul tasting 'chocolate' tablets.....
From hence forth this will be known as the Worming Incident of 2010...not happy G-Star....
Sunday 13 June - Weigh In Week 5
Well success of sorts...weigh in day resulted in a 1.5kg loss for the week...current weight 104.5kg. It would appear the ever elusive under 100kg is one step closer but in terms of the 'competition' still failing dismally on that front. As previously mentioned I am coming to the conclusion that there is something about Camp/Ranch Biggest Loser that I have to date been unable to replicate in the 'outside world'. I am still holding out the hope that at some point I will see a BIG result on the scales for my weekly efforts...dare to dream!!!
So how do things play out in terms of the Australian and US competitions...
Australian Competition
The fact that other than Caitlin, all the women in the competition after week five have hit the under 100kg mark absolutely shits me to tears...I really need to hit on the key difference between the Camp/Ranch and the outside world...
US Competition
Obviously there is something very similar between my strategy and that of the strategies embraced at Ranch Biggest Loser in the US as opposed to Camp Biggest Loser in Australia. This is actually interesting because it was something that was discussed with Sharif when we met him a few weeks ago.
Sharif noted that there is actually a fundamental difference in the approaches of the 'Trainers' in the US and in Australia. The Australian competition and 'Trainers' are purely focused on stripping fat through intensive cardiovascular workouts (treadmill, cycle, cross trainer etc) whereas in the US there appears to be a greater focus on building muscle whilst also looking at ways to shred the fat however, the more muscle you build the more effeciently your body can shred fat in the longer term. Over the last five weeks the Bastardo has very much been focussed on building muscle (strength) through high intensity weight training COMBINED with high intensity cardio work outs...the shortfall has actually resulted from my inability to maintain high intensity cardio when training my myself which is something I really need to focus on for this coming week. Sharif noted that after he was eliminated the first time from the competition he actually left the house with very little stregnth in spite of the fact he had dropped masses of body fat. What would appear to happen in the Australian series is that people are stripped of their fat in the first few weeks but they also lose massive amounts of muscle due to the type of training they are doing...the result, excellent fat loss but this is also combined with muscle loss...net result...longer term much harder to burn the fat effeciently due to the fact that you have no muscle stores in your body. Hopefully the way we are approaching this experiment, more like the US approach will see in the coming weeks some major weight loss with solid growth in muscle/strength....let's hope!
So with the week drawn to a close, I am feeling at least a little more confident about a good week to come. Really need to focus on forcing myself to keep the cardio intensity A LOT higher when I am training by myself. Am also bringing swimming back in to the equation because basically, in spite of my myriad of training 'experts' wanting me to get rid of the swimming, it is the one thing that I actually don't mind doing, I actually revel in the sense of weighlessness whilst getting a decent cardio workout...so back in the pool for at least one session a day.
Looking to up the anti again with training this week whilst maintaining the higher caloric in-take..let's just hope this will pay off by the end of the week with a massive loss...keep my eye on the prize...
Until tomorrow...yours in fatness
LBL
So how do things play out in terms of the Australian and US competitions...
Australian Competition
| Contestant | Starting Weight | Week 5 | Loss | % |
| Phil | 146.9 | 112.7 | 7 | 6.2% |
| Daina | 105.2 | 83.7 | 5 | 6.0% |
| David | 165.6 | 122.9 | 6.3 | 5.1% |
| Caitlan | 179.0 | 143.3 | 7.3 | 5.1% |
| Joe | 179.9 | 141.9 | 6.8 | 4.8% |
| Lisa | 121.9 | 96 | 4.3 | 4.5% |
| Phoebe | 116 | 93.5 | 3.9 | 4.2% |
| Chris | 129.9 | 103.2 | 4 | 3.9% |
| Shannon | 214.3 | 174.7 | 6.1 | 3.5% |
| Wayne | 161.5 | 119.9 | 4.1 | 3.4% |
| Rick | 172.6 | 133 | 4.4 | 3.3% |
| Jarna | 118.8 | 97 | 2.7 | 2.8% |
| LBL | 112 | 104.5 | 1.5 | 1.44% |
| Teneal | 97.4 |
|
|
|
| Elise | 104.6 |
|
|
|
| Jenni | 130.6 |
|
|
|
| Geoff | 161.6 |
|
|
|
| Romi | 99.3 |
|
|
|
| Allan | 151.8 |
|
|
|
The fact that other than Caitlin, all the women in the competition after week five have hit the under 100kg mark absolutely shits me to tears...I really need to hit on the key difference between the Camp/Ranch and the outside world...
US Competition
| Contestant | Starting Weight | Week 5 | Loss | % |
| Darris | 157.27 | 128.65 | 5.44 | 4.2% |
| Sherry | 99.09 | 81.82 | 2.72 | 3.3% |
| Sam | 169.09 | 140.93 | 4.54 | 3.2% |
| Michael | 239.09 | 201.38 | 5.9 | 2.9% |
| Ashley | 170.0 | 143.71 | 4.08 | 2.8% |
| Miggy | 109.09 | 93.65 | 2.27 | 2.4% |
| Melissa | 105.91 | 98.64 | 2.27 | 2.3% |
| Darryl | 190.91 | 159.1 | 3.63 | 2.3% |
| Stephanie | 120 | 102.28 | 2.27 | 2.2% |
| Sunshine | 125 | 111.38 | 2.26 | 2.0% |
| Andrea | 135.45 | 119.1 | 2.27 | 1.9% |
| Koli | 183.18 | 152.29 | 2.72 | 1.8% |
| Cheryl | 103.18 | 88.19 | 1.36 | 1.5% |
| O'Neal | 176.82 | 151.38 | 2.26 | 1.5% |
| LBL | 112 | 104.5 | 1.5 | 1.44% |
| John | 220 | 191.38 | 2.72 | 1.4% |
| Lance | 165.91 | 142.74 | 1.81 | 1.3% |
| Victoria | 162.73 | 145 | 0 | 0.0% |
| Cherita | 125.91 |
|
|
|
| Migdalia | 120.45 |
|
|
|
| Maria | 127.73 |
|
|
|
| James | 220.45 |
|
|
|
| Patti | 110.45 |
|
|
|
Obviously there is something very similar between my strategy and that of the strategies embraced at Ranch Biggest Loser in the US as opposed to Camp Biggest Loser in Australia. This is actually interesting because it was something that was discussed with Sharif when we met him a few weeks ago.
Sharif noted that there is actually a fundamental difference in the approaches of the 'Trainers' in the US and in Australia. The Australian competition and 'Trainers' are purely focused on stripping fat through intensive cardiovascular workouts (treadmill, cycle, cross trainer etc) whereas in the US there appears to be a greater focus on building muscle whilst also looking at ways to shred the fat however, the more muscle you build the more effeciently your body can shred fat in the longer term. Over the last five weeks the Bastardo has very much been focussed on building muscle (strength) through high intensity weight training COMBINED with high intensity cardio work outs...the shortfall has actually resulted from my inability to maintain high intensity cardio when training my myself which is something I really need to focus on for this coming week. Sharif noted that after he was eliminated the first time from the competition he actually left the house with very little stregnth in spite of the fact he had dropped masses of body fat. What would appear to happen in the Australian series is that people are stripped of their fat in the first few weeks but they also lose massive amounts of muscle due to the type of training they are doing...the result, excellent fat loss but this is also combined with muscle loss...net result...longer term much harder to burn the fat effeciently due to the fact that you have no muscle stores in your body. Hopefully the way we are approaching this experiment, more like the US approach will see in the coming weeks some major weight loss with solid growth in muscle/strength....let's hope!
So with the week drawn to a close, I am feeling at least a little more confident about a good week to come. Really need to focus on forcing myself to keep the cardio intensity A LOT higher when I am training by myself. Am also bringing swimming back in to the equation because basically, in spite of my myriad of training 'experts' wanting me to get rid of the swimming, it is the one thing that I actually don't mind doing, I actually revel in the sense of weighlessness whilst getting a decent cardio workout...so back in the pool for at least one session a day.
Looking to up the anti again with training this week whilst maintaining the higher caloric in-take..let's just hope this will pay off by the end of the week with a massive loss...keep my eye on the prize...
Until tomorrow...yours in fatness
LBL
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Week 5 - Saturday 12 June
Well the week is coming to an end and all in all it hasn't been the best or worst of weeks...Having upped the caloric intake to around the 1200-1500 mark per day and reduced the work outs to around 1-1 and 1/2 hours I really can't be expecting anything too stellar in the weight loss department this week.
As the weeks draw on I am coming to the conclusion that the Biggest Loser 'Competition' is for all intents and purposes 'entertainment' (and lets face it most of the time not even good entertainment) but in terms of being a 'reality' television program about weight loss that's stretching even the viewing public's limited grasp on reality a little bit too far.
I think it shows my delusions of grandeur thinking that I could, in spite of all my efforts, pull weight loss weeks of 5,10,15kg....obviously the false environment of Camp/Ranch Biggest Loser delivers something that I simply cannot replicate in this 'on the outside' experiment. That's not to say I am going to give up trying...with the week that saw me battling a close call with the flu, staving off an infected throat and really just pretty much feeling completely shitty for the entire week it is completely unrealistic to expect any massive weight loss to show on the scales tomorrow.
That said the day's efforts at training were, to say the least IMPRESSIVE...we have firmly established that Bastardo is, in actuality, attempting to kill me and take the G-Star into the bowels of Satan's Lair just for the hell of it...but even he out did himself this morning. We kicked off at 8.00am for a cardio box session which really was nearly 45mins of sheer unadulterated hell...this was then backed up by a further 20mins of high intensity torture when the Bastard decided that since he was not going to have my delightful company for a few days (due to the long weekend) that he really needed his daily 'run' fix...
So all in all the morning's wanderings through Satan's Lair played out a bit like this:
Training Time:8.09am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 10min 07sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 705
Cal Fat: 24%
After breakfast (our usually Saturday morning 'treat' whilst still watching the calories) I came home and well...passed out for about 2 hours. I am finding that sleep is becoming INCREDIBLY important to me due to the fact that well...basically...I can't move any part of my body without pain (perhaps a slight exaggeration but hell, its my story to tell!).
The G-Star decided my ritual humiliation and torture had not been complete for the day and so off to the Hellfire once again for another 30min cardio session which although very slow burn (as I physically could not convince my shins or any other part of my body for that matter to run) resulted in:
Training Time:3.26pm
Length of Training Time: 31min 12sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 264
Cal Fat: 34%
So all in all in spite of a fairly ordinary week and a real sense of failure stemming from my previous week's efforts, I have a small level of confidence that this week will at least see me step a little closer to the ever elusive under 100kg mark...here's hoping...
Until weigh in tomorrow
Yours in fatness
LBL
As the weeks draw on I am coming to the conclusion that the Biggest Loser 'Competition' is for all intents and purposes 'entertainment' (and lets face it most of the time not even good entertainment) but in terms of being a 'reality' television program about weight loss that's stretching even the viewing public's limited grasp on reality a little bit too far.
I think it shows my delusions of grandeur thinking that I could, in spite of all my efforts, pull weight loss weeks of 5,10,15kg....obviously the false environment of Camp/Ranch Biggest Loser delivers something that I simply cannot replicate in this 'on the outside' experiment. That's not to say I am going to give up trying...with the week that saw me battling a close call with the flu, staving off an infected throat and really just pretty much feeling completely shitty for the entire week it is completely unrealistic to expect any massive weight loss to show on the scales tomorrow.
That said the day's efforts at training were, to say the least IMPRESSIVE...we have firmly established that Bastardo is, in actuality, attempting to kill me and take the G-Star into the bowels of Satan's Lair just for the hell of it...but even he out did himself this morning. We kicked off at 8.00am for a cardio box session which really was nearly 45mins of sheer unadulterated hell...this was then backed up by a further 20mins of high intensity torture when the Bastard decided that since he was not going to have my delightful company for a few days (due to the long weekend) that he really needed his daily 'run' fix...
So all in all the morning's wanderings through Satan's Lair played out a bit like this:
Training Time:8.09am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 10min 07sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 705
Cal Fat: 24%
After breakfast (our usually Saturday morning 'treat' whilst still watching the calories) I came home and well...passed out for about 2 hours. I am finding that sleep is becoming INCREDIBLY important to me due to the fact that well...basically...I can't move any part of my body without pain (perhaps a slight exaggeration but hell, its my story to tell!).
The G-Star decided my ritual humiliation and torture had not been complete for the day and so off to the Hellfire once again for another 30min cardio session which although very slow burn (as I physically could not convince my shins or any other part of my body for that matter to run) resulted in:
Training Time:3.26pm
Length of Training Time: 31min 12sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 264
Cal Fat: 34%
So all in all in spite of a fairly ordinary week and a real sense of failure stemming from my previous week's efforts, I have a small level of confidence that this week will at least see me step a little closer to the ever elusive under 100kg mark...here's hoping...
Until weigh in tomorrow
Yours in fatness
LBL
Friday, June 11, 2010
Week 5 - Friday 11 June
Still feeling the after effects of this week's brush with 'the flu' and I had absolutely no junk in my trunk at training this morning so the Bastardo decided today was the day he was GOING TO KILL ME...and he thought he might just attempt to do the same to the G-Star.
45 mins of pure unadulterated torture at the hands of Bastardo...weights, cardio, more weights, more cardio, more and more weights, more and more cardio...well you get the picture.
The morning's session panned out along these lines:
Training Time:10.09am
Length of Training Time: 50min 15sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 394
Cal Fat: 36%
Other than that the day was virtually non-eventful EXCEPT for the fact that I was able to purchase clothing, yes that's right clothing, at Rebel Sport...what you say that's insane! Well insane it may be but yes the G-Star discovered on their throw out rack a series of Running Bare knee length shorts (size 22 - who'd have thought) that actually fit and didn't look like the pants of...well....a really incredibly fat person....they only resembled the pants of a fat person...score!
Did indulge my poor fat body in a massage for an hour and a half and then off to dinner for girls night out with the absolute intention of over indulging (read as giving in to temptation) and having pizza AND dessert! Alas the pizza and dessert gods were against me with neither pizza nor dessert (at least not the apple pie I wanted) being available so it was a Vegetarian burger at FAB with six litres of water and then home for low fat ice cream with almost no taste diet sauce...behave!
With weigh in only a day away I suppose the fat gods were trying to prevent me from completely f***ing week five's efforts so for that I should be grateful...I suppose... once again only looking for a modest loss (and when I say modest I am talking about OVER 1kg for the week!)
Until tomorrow
Yours in fatness
LBL
45 mins of pure unadulterated torture at the hands of Bastardo...weights, cardio, more weights, more cardio, more and more weights, more and more cardio...well you get the picture.
The morning's session panned out along these lines:
Training Time:10.09am
Length of Training Time: 50min 15sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 394
Cal Fat: 36%
Other than that the day was virtually non-eventful EXCEPT for the fact that I was able to purchase clothing, yes that's right clothing, at Rebel Sport...what you say that's insane! Well insane it may be but yes the G-Star discovered on their throw out rack a series of Running Bare knee length shorts (size 22 - who'd have thought) that actually fit and didn't look like the pants of...well....a really incredibly fat person....they only resembled the pants of a fat person...score!
Did indulge my poor fat body in a massage for an hour and a half and then off to dinner for girls night out with the absolute intention of over indulging (read as giving in to temptation) and having pizza AND dessert! Alas the pizza and dessert gods were against me with neither pizza nor dessert (at least not the apple pie I wanted) being available so it was a Vegetarian burger at FAB with six litres of water and then home for low fat ice cream with almost no taste diet sauce...behave!
With weigh in only a day away I suppose the fat gods were trying to prevent me from completely f***ing week five's efforts so for that I should be grateful...I suppose... once again only looking for a modest loss (and when I say modest I am talking about OVER 1kg for the week!)
Until tomorrow
Yours in fatness
LBL
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Week 5 - Thursday 10 June
The day's are all looking pretty much the same at the moment...up in the morning, make the G-Star breakfast in bed as a bribe to get up and train with me...off to Satan's Lair for a bit of cardio and a PT session...off to get our morning nectar of the Gods (mmmm coffee) back home for a shower and some breakfast...potter around and do some work...have a Nana nap...lunch and then back to Satan's Lair for a cardio session (buddy run with Bastardo and G-Star) a sauna and then off home for dinner and bed and do it all over again the next day.
Weight loss Biggest Loser style can obviously be somewhat monotonous and believe me there is plenty of time to convince yourself throughout the day that you don't have the energy, the stamina, the desire or even the need to be doing this...isn't big beautiful? isn't fat fashionable? isn't spherical sexy? isn't it? isn't it????
Much to G-Star's dismay her pep talks really don't cut the mustard with me...I have been fortunate enough to be completely, unreservedly, unconditionally loved by the wonderful G-Star for over 10 years...fat, fatter even fattest...the G-Star continues to love and support me therefore when she attempts to give me a pep talk its all a bit ho hum really (love you G-Star!) So feeling pretty much shit and as previously mentioned earlier in the week completely over this crap I was thrilled to find in my e-mail in tray a message from my Biggest Loser Guru Sharif!
Highlighting to him my rather piss poor efforts for the previous weeks he had a piece of sage advice...you're now 200grams lighter than you were this time last week...he also mentioned that it is probably time to mix things up a bit and try a little harder with the cardio...point taken!
So the day played out pretty much like the one before:
Training Time:6.58am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 20sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 428
Cal Fat: 39%
Training Time:4.02pm
Length of Training Time: 32min 06sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 350
Cal Fat: 20%
Food has also been on the up as well (literally)...have been aiming (and achieving) around 1200 - 1500 calories each day. However need to seriously look at upping the anti in terms of fruit and veg in the diet...have been pretty good with carbs (under control) and good fats but need to try to get a bit creative with how I take my f&v....need to look into some of the low fat, low calorie cooking books and come up with some ideas that I can pre-prepare for each day....
I think the lesson that is coming through loud and clear at the moment for the weight loss machine that is fat little me is that being fully and really prepared for each day is an absolute necessity if I am going to actually get this done and done properly...more pearls of wisdom from your fat guru in weeks to come...until then...
Yours in fatness
LBL
Weight loss Biggest Loser style can obviously be somewhat monotonous and believe me there is plenty of time to convince yourself throughout the day that you don't have the energy, the stamina, the desire or even the need to be doing this...isn't big beautiful? isn't fat fashionable? isn't spherical sexy? isn't it? isn't it????
Much to G-Star's dismay her pep talks really don't cut the mustard with me...I have been fortunate enough to be completely, unreservedly, unconditionally loved by the wonderful G-Star for over 10 years...fat, fatter even fattest...the G-Star continues to love and support me therefore when she attempts to give me a pep talk its all a bit ho hum really (love you G-Star!) So feeling pretty much shit and as previously mentioned earlier in the week completely over this crap I was thrilled to find in my e-mail in tray a message from my Biggest Loser Guru Sharif!
Highlighting to him my rather piss poor efforts for the previous weeks he had a piece of sage advice...you're now 200grams lighter than you were this time last week...he also mentioned that it is probably time to mix things up a bit and try a little harder with the cardio...point taken!
So the day played out pretty much like the one before:
Training Time:6.58am
Length of Training Time: 1hour 20sec
Intensity: 1-2
Calories Burnt: 428
Cal Fat: 39%
Training Time:4.02pm
Length of Training Time: 32min 06sec
Intensity: 1-3
Calories Burnt: 350
Cal Fat: 20%
Food has also been on the up as well (literally)...have been aiming (and achieving) around 1200 - 1500 calories each day. However need to seriously look at upping the anti in terms of fruit and veg in the diet...have been pretty good with carbs (under control) and good fats but need to try to get a bit creative with how I take my f&v....need to look into some of the low fat, low calorie cooking books and come up with some ideas that I can pre-prepare for each day....
I think the lesson that is coming through loud and clear at the moment for the weight loss machine that is fat little me is that being fully and really prepared for each day is an absolute necessity if I am going to actually get this done and done properly...more pearls of wisdom from your fat guru in weeks to come...until then...
Yours in fatness
LBL
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